Glenn Campbell's tweet archive, searching for "happ"

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Also try official twitter search for "happ" in @BadDalaiLama - @KilroyCafe - @BadLamaArt. (Word must be exact. Includes reader replies but not BDL retweets.)

Searching the archives for both @BadDalaiLama and @KilroyCafe for Glenn Campbell's tweets. Click on date to view original tweet on Twitter. Search is based on the downloaded archive, which is updated about every two weeks, so this search may not include the most recent tweets. Multi-line tweets may not be complete in this listing. See our Twitter Overview for more info. Help give these tweets new life by retweeting the ones you like.

1: 2018-10-20: Conscientiousness is when someone takes actions now to prevent problems in the future, instead of waiting for the problems to happen first. Only a fraction of humanity is capable of this.
2: 2018-10-12: I’m kind of disappointed that the big Trump Economic Crash* didn’t happen today. Apparently, we will have to wait. (*The Trump Economic Crash is when the markets reverse all of their gains since Trump was elected.)
3: 2018-06-30: What the Trump base wants is more cruelty, more bloodsport. In Roman terms, they want too see more Christians thrown to the lions, which the emperor is happy to give them.
4: 2018-06-21: My Marvel superhero name should be Plotmaster. My superpower is being able to tell what is going to happen in future Marvel movies based only on past Marvel movies. My famous quote: “Why do I need to see the new Avengers movie when I know exactly what will happen?”
5: 2018-04-28: Kudos to the Trump TV series! The Dr. Ronny episode was one of the best. The moment he stood at the podium to announce Trump’s incredible health, you knew something was going to happen, and it did. Great writing! Almost as much fun as the Scaramucci episode.
6: 2017-11-30: Intern to powerful politician: “If you refuse my sexual advances, I will accuse you of sexual harassment.” Can it happen?
7: 2017-11-29: Today’s episode of A Prairie Home Companion is sponsored by Powdermilk Biscuits, Bertha's Kitty Boutique and WTF Is Happening.
8: 2017-11-01: Happy Halloween Candy Discount Day! 🎃🍬$✂️
9: 2017-08-08: I'd like to take Wonder Woman's Lasso of Truth, wrap it around Donald Trump and see what happens. Bet he self-destructs.
10: 2017-08-06: I'd like to take Wonder Woman's Lasso of Truth, wrap it around Donald Trump and see what happens. Bet he self-destructs.
11: 2017-07-27: Paranoia means you'll never get better than what you secretly think you deserve, because if it happens you'll suspect it and shoot it down.
12: 2017-07-21: What will he do today? The sensible thing would be to shut up, obey his lawyers and pretend to be President. That won't happen!
13: 2017-06-15: Los Angeles is a small provincial village that happens to control what the world thinks and feels through its entertainment products.
14: 2017-05-20: Take an elevator from the top of the tower to the bottom: no problem. Jump: big problem. It's not the distance traveled but how it happens.
15: 2017-04-25: "Happiness equals reality minus expectations."
16: 2017-02-03: Kids these days. Why, when I was a kid news happened slowly and we'd read about it the next day in the newspaper.
17: 2016-12-21: I hate to be the Grinch who says this, but I don't care what happens in a fictional galaxy long ago and far away.
18: 2016-12-19: RT @washingtonpost: In Poland, a case study of what happens when populists come to power https://t.co/ElILcWcCIi
19: 2016-12-11: If a risk was taken, the fact that nothing bad happened does not prove the decision was right.
20: 2016-11-09: This is what will happen next: The Comedy-Entertainment-Journalism Complex is going to feast on Trump like sharks on fresh meat.
21: 2016-11-09: RT @RosieGray: No matter what happens tonight the world will never be the same. Strength of populist nationalism in the West is reaching a…
22: 2016-11-08: Happy Election Day! Your choice today is between... https://t.co/WvsqQInWJH
23: 2016-09-08: If you had a nice motorcycle you were really proud of, you wouldn't throw sand in the oil just to see what would happen. #drugs
24: 2016-06-27: RT @washingtonpost: An astute online comment has some wondering whether Brexit may ever happen https://t.co/Tj1Or2VWk7
25: 2016-05-16: Only bald people are allowed to tell bald people jokes. I could take advantage of that ethnic exemption. I just don't happen to have any.
26: 2016-02-27: If you consider yourself happy, don't assume the rest of the world is fine. Yours is a tiny island of peace in a world of suffering.
27: 2016-01-03: I'm on Team Proactive—a band of unlikely superheroes who use their special powers of planning ahead to avert problems before they happen.
28: 2015-11-04: Statistical analysis of UFO reports reveals remarkable patterns: They happen to cluster around the cities where there are UFO groups.
29: 2015-09-21: It used to make me happy, but now it doesn't. Now it just makes me unhappy when I don't have it. #addiction
30: 2015-08-17: According to Alvin Toffler, we should all be Future Shocked by now. I wonder when that's going to happen.
31: 2015-08-10: RT @audipenny: person: go for it, what's the worst that could happen
32: 2015-07-26: Accidents happen to everyone. If you want to die in the next one, ride a motorcycle.
33: 2015-07-24: These days, being left-handed or right-handed is displayed only in how you hold your computer mouse—unless you happen to be ambimousetrous.
34: 2015-07-20: If the best-qualified job candidate happens to be a white male, it is discrimination to give the job to anyone else.
35: 2015-07-14: The world is a tragic place with only a few small islands of slightly deluded happiness.
36: 2015-07-08: RT @Peripatetia: My photo albums from Greece in a happier time. http://t.co/VAQRRq9P0H http://t.co/ejrcPJyCCk
37: 2015-05-24: Teenage crush on an inaccessible celebrity. Evidence now destroyed. Never happened.
38: 2015-04-18: Putin rewriting Russian history to say nothing bad ever happened.
39: 2015-04-14: "One of the great ironies of filming reality TV is that, as fake as it is,some amazing real stuff happens to the crews filming it." @cracked
40: 2015-03-16: Before Facebook, we used to ask "What ever happened to...?" Now we know, and it's usually not very interesting.
41: 2015-02-28: Spock has died and come back to life before. The same will probably happen again this time.
42: 2015-02-16: RT @SilverJacket: Happy V Day! Do opposites attract, or do birds of a feather flock together? Let's see what science has to say: http://t.c…
43: 2015-02-12: Anyone can adapt to the demands of the moment. Very few can project ahead and accurately predict what happens next.
44: 2014-12-15: The hardest confession: I knew I shouldn't have done it, but I did it anyway, and bad things happened because of it.
45: 2014-12-03: I am not an American. I am a citizen of the world who happens to have been born in America.
46: 2014-11-25: It is silly to criticize movies for being factually inaccurate. All fiction, by definition, is something that couldn't happen in real life.
47: 2014-11-04: RT @cracked: You physically can't feel happiness for very long. 5 Scientific Reasons Your Idea of Happiness Is Wrong - http://t.co/v6ZXAb8L…
48: 2014-11-02: Russia has gone so far off the deep end that international pressure doesn't mean much. All we can do is sit back and watch what happens.
49: 2014-10-18: RT @guardian: Eurozone crisis, five years on: no happy ending in sight for Greek odyssey http://t.co/EoWaPLutE5
50: 2014-09-20: What I planned vs. what actually happened. (drawing by Julia Gamolina) http://t.co/rulCTNh9P0
51: 2014-09-02: Creative motivation requires a modicum of hunger and risk. If you're too fat and happy, you won't do a damn thing.
52: 2014-08-31: What your mouth says: "I'm very happy for you."
53: 2014-08-18: In the dystopian future, Amazon, Google and Walmart will consume everything. Oh wait, hasn't that already happened?
54: 2014-08-15: Showbiz is a happy place as long as you win. The catch: Hardly anyone wins.
55: 2014-08-14: Experts talking about whatever just happened in the news, sounding very authoritative, saying nothing.
56: 2014-07-23: RT @TheTweetOfGod: What happens after you die? I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you.
57: 2014-07-04: RT @HLMenckenBot: Man is not actually happy when free; he is uncomfortable, a bit alarmed, and intolerably lonely.
58: 2014-07-01: That Pharrell Williams "Happy" song creeps me out. Have we regressed to the 70s? Next we'll see a remix of "Up With People".
59: 2014-05-30: @Happenstance5 I'm never where I was, only where Ii am. Are you in Rio?
60: 2014-05-18: Some of the best developments in your life could not have happened without a disaster clearing the way.
61: 2014-05-10: I fear my data resides in Matrix-like pods on the server farm, only thinking it is happy due to inputs piped in.
62: 2014-05-08: Happy Dog Lucky Pet Snack. Made in China from finest ingredient. Make dog happy. Or dead.
63: 2014-05-06: Disease of Success: people fighting for the life they want, getting it, not being happy but not changing because of all they have invested.
64: 2014-05-04: RT @TIME: SNL shows the terrifying things that will happen if you dare disrespect Beyoncé http://t.co/2qecqA39Hr
65: 2014-04-12: All my life I've suffered mysterious blackouts. I lose consciousness and regain it hours later, remembering little. They happen every night.
66: 2014-03-31: If you happen to be in Flekke, Norway on April 11 feel free to drop in my chat with UWCRCN students. http://t.co/DSE49amAOr
67: 2014-03-23: Ads on Google Maps had to happen. I just encountered one for the first time and can't figure out how to remove it. http://t.co/2rLJ77ssOx
68: 2014-03-16: RT @Happenstance5: "Confidence is silent. Insecurities are loud."
69: 2014-02-15: Fill in the blank: "If I only had ___ I would be happy now." Spoiler alert: You don't need ___. You can fight for it, but it won't deliver.
70: 2014-01-31: Does it really make you happy, or did it used to make you happy and now you have no choice?
71: 2014-01-31: RT @Happenstance5: "You will not be punished for your anger. You will be punished by your anger." ~ Buddha
72: 2014-01-29: Declaring in advance how your journey must happen usually guarantees that the journey won't happen.
73: 2014-01-19: In seemingly normal suburbia, a hidden terror lurks. An all-too-real horror movie that could happen to YOU... The House That Ate Its Owner
74: 2014-01-19: God is not happy.
75: 2014-01-15: RT @nypost: Want a happy relationship? Don't have kids http://t.co/y2rdolir4i
76: 2014-01-06: The world is full of tragic, intractable problems that don't happen to be mine, and I'm okay with that.
77: 2014-01-03: I'm on Team Proactive—a band of unlikely superheroes who, using the special powers each possesses, solves problems before they happen.
78: 2014-01-01: RT @DalaiLama: Today, let us wish each other a Happy New Year, but also that we may make it meaningful. <== Okay, how do we do that?
79: 2013-12-25: @BadDalaiLama (Sentimental tweet. Sorry. Won't happen again.)
80: 2013-12-22: Like Putin, my political hegemony is reinforced by control of the news media. Nothing happens on my Facebook or Twitter without my approval.
81: 2013-12-22: @TheBosha It has happened before.
82: 2013-12-18: On My Bucket List: Discover through divine revelation that the only true religion is the one I happened to be born into.
83: 2013-12-09: Long-anticipated moments in history are always "yawn" moments when they finally happen. re #area51 @TIME - Comments: https://t.co/msuqG2iL9E
84: 2013-12-07: On My Bucket List: Promote my product with stock images of happy people enjoying the good life.
85: 2013-12-03: Wanting it so badly that your own desperation prevents it from happening.
86: 2013-12-01: Love is a form of clinical insanity. Crazy things happen, not all of them good.
87: 2013-11-03: Committing to a precise long-term goal means you are unable to pursue unexpected opportunities that happen to appear.
88: 2013-10-28: Yes, it makes me happy @ The Warsaw Hostel http://t.co/XTXVk8AJuT
89: 2013-10-15: What happens to the 1% that aren't killed? Don't they just reproduce and make stronger germs? http://t.co/TC4NddjLNH
90: 2013-10-14: For the best guarantee of happiness, you should decide what you want when you want it, not in advance. ... http://t.co/3QOaBxHjQz
91: 2013-10-12: On My Bucket List: Fiercely defend the religion or ethnic group I happen to have been born into.
92: 2013-10-05: Proprietor assures me they were happy clams before they died. @ Pt Townsend Farmers Market http://t.co/KkhbhiFkBc
93: 2013-10-03: “Don’t worry, be happy!”—at your peril! If you don’t worry and take preemptive action when needed, you'll have a lot more to worry about.
94: 2013-09-25: People can change. It sometimes happens. But if you must wager your own life on one outcome, expect past behavior to continue.
95: 2013-09-24: Just because you are a tree that has grown taller than all the others doesn't make you happier than all the other plants.
96: 2013-09-12: Facebook makes you happy if you are an active contributor and unhappy if you are a passive scroller.
97: 2013-09-11: A law of nature: Whenever a good thing happens, parasites come along to suck off it, so the good thing has to invest in defenses.
98: 2013-09-08: If you had a nice motorcycle you were really proud of, you wouldn't throw sand in the oil just to see what would happen.
99: 2013-08-28: Before you call for revolution, ask yourself how many of those things have turned out happily.
100: 2013-08-27: Happiness is a moving target. Just when you think you have it nailed down, it jumps to someplace else.
101: 2013-08-21: The relatives who are unhappy with your current lifestyle are not going to be happy even when you change it to suit them. It never ends!
102: 2013-08-19: We all love it when this happens to Internet billionaires: @DailyMailUS
103: 2013-07-31: RT @MailOnline: Being HAPPY leads to strong immune cells http://t.co/ooKfk1claK
104: 2013-07-29: According to Kant, you can't do a damn thing without imagining what would happen if everyone else in the world did the same.
105: 2013-07-21: It is okay to be happy, but don't let it deceive you into thinking the world is a happy place.
106: 2013-06-30: Playing Russian Roulette, if you pull the trigger and nothing happens, it gets easier to spin again.
107: 2013-06-29: "The best book I've ever read on how romantic relationships work." ~ another happy reader of http://t.co/xdlcYbmxpF http://t.co/K80GvfWKOj
108: 2013-06-29: RT @GreatestQuotes: "Most of us are just about as happy as we make up our minds to be." - Abraham Lincoln
109: 2013-06-28: @MinnieGupta Parallel universe portals can open up anywhere, so just relax, go to the gym and let it happen.
110: 2013-06-28: RT @kamtweeting: Beautiful minds don't just happen. They're welded by pain, then forged by the need to get rid of it.
111: 2013-06-27: The main benefits of experience do not happen at the time but only after you have analyzed what happened to you.
112: 2013-06-23: Those who seek validation through fame don't care how it happens or whether they accomplish anything that deserves it.
113: 2013-06-07: Now in Syntagma Square, site of many protests and a faux Beatles concert in happier days. My photos: http://t.co/9LttTRx0Hh
114: 2013-05-20: I never lived through war, but I am old enough to remember the Rural Purge of 1970-71. Those were not happy times.
115: 2013-05-14: After the ship hits the iceberg, it is easy to believe it isn't sinking because it is happening slowly and so emotionally inconvenient.
116: 2013-05-12: I respect your beliefs, no matter what they are. If you believe 2 + 2 = 5, I won't protest. In fact, I'll happily do business with you!
117: 2013-05-07: Validation is swell when it happens, but you aren't going to get very far if you wait for it.
118: 2013-05-04: With time, past mistakes and traumas fade to neutrality and begin to look like any other piece of history—just something that happened.
119: 2013-04-30: Any addict becomes a sociopath over time. He doesn't care what happens to others as long as he gets his fix.
120: 2013-04-28: One is happenstance. Two is coincidence. Three is a pattern. Four is boredom.
121: 2013-04-21: If you kill "99.99% of germs", what happens to the 0.01% that survive? Don't they breed and create stronger germs? http://t.co/XoSSvrfQLg
122: 2013-04-20: RT @HLMenckenBot: Man is not actually happy when free; he is uncomfortable, a bit alarmed, and intolerably lonely.
123: 2013-04-17: RT @Ruth_A_Buzzi: Why can you find every flavor of cat food except mouse? Happy #CATurday
124: 2013-04-17: "If it's in the news, don't worry about it. By definition, news is something that almost never happens." http://t.co/AIiOevg5VF
125: 2013-04-11: Proposing a new dietary measurement system: Happiness Per Calorie (HPC).
126: 2013-03-31: Whatever happened to World's Fairs? Is that still a thing? (@ World's Fair Park) [pic]: http://t.co/H1GeIL7saM
127: 2013-03-31: Evidence out of Russia suggests average Russians are pretty happy being ruled by corrupt bureaucrats. It's what they're familiar with.
128: 2013-03-30: In dreams and memories, most sensory information is lost. We do not recall color, 3-D or stereo. We only remember what happened.
129: 2013-03-29: Get used to trauma. Learn to deal with it, because one way or another, sometime in your life, it will happen to you.
130: 2013-03-29: What happens when you put a Peep in an EXTREMELY POWERFUL microwave oven. http://t.co/5EIOaaRRr2
131: 2013-03-26: Finally putting the Frogs in their place! ==> the French are less happy... http://t.co/2Gq2jBBmKM
132: 2013-03-26: The myth of rescue: Some powerful "other" is going to recognize our virtue and give us the keys to happiness we can't obtain for ourselves.
133: 2013-03-25: "Organic" — something that flows naturally from the unique circumstances and resources that happen to be available to you.
134: 2013-03-15: Unlikely coincidences are likely to happen. You just don't know where.
135: 2013-03-14: Serendipity can't be planned or predicted, but you can arrange your life to be ready to change course when it happens.
136: 2013-03-14: The downturn couldn't have happened at a worse time for this average family, which has already overcommitted itself based on the boom times.
137: 2013-03-11: Landfill waste is happy waste. Not polluting anything. Just sitting there 'til future robots decide to use it for something.
138: 2013-03-04: @BadDalaiLama Choose your friends from the pool of modelers for a happier life experience.
139: 2013-03-04: Almost anyone can see someone cry and know they're unhappy. Not everyone can predict it or grasp the factors that made it happen.
140: 2013-03-01: And they all lived happily never after. (How most fairytales end in real life.)
141: 2013-02-23: Surfing is the art of catching a wave when it happens, not demanding that there be one when you want it.
142: 2013-02-23: Many will dream of something better. Few will grab unexpected opportunities when they happen.
143: 2013-02-23: RT @KilroyCafe: Happiness is not a permanent condition. It must be constantly renegotiated and cannot be nailed down in the future by an ...
144: 2013-02-14: Do instant deaths that appear on television deserve more attention than deaths that happen quietly after long suffering? @BadDalaiLama
145: 2013-02-13: A movie scene is when a character interacts with the world, something unexpected happens and he is changed by it.
146: 2013-02-11: "It was all just a dream" is the stupidest way to end a movie—unless it happens to be true and you just woke up.
147: 2013-01-30: My book was mentioned today on Turkish television! (Bet that's never happened to YOU!) http://t.co/e5OQ7Jy4 http://t.co/XwuoUtxe
148: 2013-01-29: @MinnieGupta Photos or it didn't happen.
149: 2013-01-22: Love usually means you will ignore something better if it happens to come your way.
150: 2013-01-22: Tropical car camping tips: 3) Prepare for rain, which almost always happens sometime before dawn. (re @BadDalaiLama)
151: 2013-01-21: Happyfruit... or sadfruit? http://t.co/fZOpAIqT
152: 2013-01-16: When something bad happens to you, you can either do something about it or you can't. If you can't, let it go!
153: 2013-01-16: To understand a character you must ask, "What is his dysfunction and how did it happen?"
154: 2013-01-15: Whatever happens, never lose your heads. - re @latimes
155: 2013-01-09: Don't worry be happy ignore danger die sooner.
156: 2012-12-16: Trying to "lock in" happiness with a long-term contract is like nailing Jello to a wall. The nail stays but not the Jello.
157: 2012-12-15: Beauty pageants usually culminate with one girl saying, "I don't deserve this!" and fifty others pretending to be SO happy for her.
158: 2012-12-15: None of us has the ability to resist temptation completely, but we can delay it, divert it and avoid the places where it happens.
159: 2012-12-15: Happiness is a moving target. Whenever you try to nail it down, it slips out from under you.
160: 2012-12-15: Are you pursuing a goal because it makes you happy or because you have already announced it to the world and don't want to be embarrassed?
161: 2012-12-15: If you are losing focus on your dreams, maybe you should change them. Happiness is moving target, not a fixed destination.
162: 2012-12-14: The happiest part of The Hobbit. http://t.co/sujRhu7b
163: 2012-12-13: feral guvmint — n. them folks up in Washington that's always tryin' to tell us what ta do. Wouldn'ta happened if Lee hadn't surrendered!
164: 2012-12-12: Really excited about 12:12:12 on 12/12/12! This hasn't happened since... last year and the year before that and the year before that and...
165: 2012-12-11: OMG! Just experienced 12:12:12 on 12/12/12! This hasn't happened since... last year... and the year before that.
166: 2012-12-10: Any human can respond to demands. Very few are proactive, with the initiative to explore the world and solve problems before they happen.
167: 2012-12-08: Everything that happens to you is your own responsibility regardless of the cause.
168: 2012-11-29: The main human defect: claiming to want something but consistently taking actions that assure it will never happen.
169: 2012-11-18: RT @KilroyCafe: The news is a convenient addiction to distract you from how little is happening in your own life.
170: 2012-11-16: On My Bucket List: Fire missiles indiscriminately into Israel, just to see what will happen.
171: 2012-11-11: Colorblindness happens with emotions too. What you can see, they are blind to, and no words can explain it to them. You can only withdraw.
172: 2012-11-08: Slap a "Premium" label on anything and people with the means will happily pay more for it—"Because I'm worth it!"
173: 2012-11-07: "Aside from love, few activities seem to promise us as much happiness as traveling..."—Alain de Botton <== With about the same track record.
174: 2012-11-07: Is happiness worth the cost? The risk when people become happy is they fall into comfortable routines and never do a damn thing again.
175: 2012-11-04: Every relationship has a break-even point where the costs begin to outweigh the benefits. Could happen early or late, but it will happen.
176: 2012-11-02: When we fully process the traumas of the past, they fade to insignificance. If the same thing happened again, we know how to deal with it.
177: 2012-10-30: A thousand photos of World War II can't tell you what happened. Only words can do that.
178: 2012-10-29: RT @aristosophy: Life is what doesn't happen to you while you're busy making tweets.
179: 2012-10-24: The Happy Meal comes with a cut-out Scooby-Doo that attaches to your straw. http://t.co/dEFfLg9z
180: 2012-10-24: Fast Food Diet™ - Day 3: Scooby-Doo Hamburger Happy Meal, 365 calories. http://t.co/ZuQ13l5o
181: 2012-10-12: BBC crew held at Area 51 http://t.co/6VGU1Gwt (This is what happens when a TV crew fails to consult me.)
182: 2012-10-09: Canada is a weird parallel universe of the U.S. It's like, "What would happen if..."
183: 2012-09-26: Happy Birthday! I baked you a virtual cake and made you a virtual card and here's a gift certificate for Netflix. Glad Facebook reminded me!
184: 2012-09-26: @noemiruth It didn't happen. It's on my Bucket List.
185: 2012-09-21: Everyone remembers the Titanic but no one cares what happened to the iceberg.
186: 2012-09-20: Happiness is a moving target. One thing might make you happy for a while but never permanently.
187: 2012-09-19: Hubris is when someone rolls the dice, happens to win and thinks thereafter that he can't lose.
188: 2012-09-17: Honeymoon Tragedy: Bride Dies In Fatal Slip While Posing For Photos At Scenic Falls #happensallthetime #shouldnthavemarried
189: 2012-09-10: RT @KilroyCafe: If something makes you feel good now, repeating it 10x won't make you 10x happier, yet people make permanent plans based ...
190: 2012-08-25: The meaning of your life derives from "proactive hedonism"—planning ahead for the complex sensations that really make you happy over time.
191: 2012-08-23: RT @lawnrocket: Something happens twice = coincidence. Something happens three times = pattern. Establish your pattern before breaking i ...
192: 2012-07-28: Travel Tales of the Unexplained: I rented a Hertz car in Seattle and it has HAWAII plates! How did that happen? http://t.co/pvYirLya
193: 2012-07-21: You think you have things all worked out, then something happens. Something always happens. That's just the way of the world.
194: 2012-07-06: On My Bucket List: Start my own eugenics program using my own gametes for one half the initial genetic material. See what happens.
195: 2012-07-05: This is what happens when girls sell out. http://t.co/XBYMPrTs
196: 2012-06-29: OMG! Walstock 2012 happening RIGHT NOW in L.A.'s Chinatown!!! I'm heading that way now! http://t.co/CjNuFGMN
197: 2012-06-26: RT @piratehook3r @kneedull you know you never really hear about dinosaur sex <== Must have happened, but how?
198: 2012-06-16: A happy day in Skopje, Macedonia (earlier today) http://t.co/9O5ebEPK
199: 2012-06-10: Some of my best "Art" photos http://t.co/K05hC4HC (I don't intend to be artsy, but sometimes this shit just happens.) http://t.co/sdFxDcRC
200: 2012-06-10: @DalyaElMaghraby We can't save you from yourself. I will wish you the greatest joy and happiness.
201: 2012-06-10: .@Kyoks1 "Since when you are trying to be diplomatic?" <== Sorry about that! Keep forgetting I'm Bad. Won't happen again!
202: 2012-06-05: (I can just tell by eating this jerky that these were happy cows.)
203: 2012-06-03: A valuable but neglected use of Facebook is keeping your own private diary of what happened when (posts visible only to you).
204: 2012-05-29: RT @Maxine12339: @BadDalaiLama only other delusion I had was nothing bad will happen in my life. Everything will be taken care of by pa ...
205: 2012-05-27: "The purpose of our lives is to be happy."—Dalai Lama <== Another bland truism. What is "happy"? Long or short term? How do you get it?
206: 2012-05-26: If you insist on having the proper outfit for a certain activity and following all the standard procedures, the activity won't happen often.
207: 2012-05-24: @KelleyLPhoto You see what happens when we constrain our feet with shoes: that little toe all curled in.
208: 2012-05-23: RT @KilroyCafe: Bad things happen when you insulate people from the effects of their own actions.
209: 2012-05-16: On My Bucket List: Release a breeding pair of piranhas into the lower Mississippi just to see what will happen.
210: 2012-05-16: Patriotism is your unquestioning faith in whatever country you happen to be born in.
211: 2012-05-16: "Don't worry, be happy!" — famous last words.
212: 2012-05-12: The 1960s was the dawning of Age of Aquarius, a new era of peace, love and freedom. So what ever happened with that?
213: 2012-05-09: .@Kyoks1 Liberal delusion: more government regulation can make health care more efficient. It has never happened in the past.
214: 2012-05-09: I resorted to caffeine today to get through a long drive. Happens about once a week. More than that and it becomes an addiction again.
215: 2012-05-06: People want to accomplish great things, but they aren't willing to give up any of their prior investments, so those things never happen.
216: 2012-05-04: 44-second video of a procession I came upon in Tokyo two weeks ago. http://t.co/GK3tos0E What's happening? You tell me!
217: 2012-05-01: People like to say "Someday I'm going to..." but they impose so many conditions that someday never happens.
218: 2012-04-30: Ikea dessert. Allow me my indulgence. Doesn't happen often. http://t.co/xiSUCjr5
219: 2012-04-26: You want a happy little Blue Pill suburban existence where everything makes sense and all unhappiness is kept out of town by demographics.
220: 2012-04-22: TokyoFact 2: Tokyo is the safest and cleanest big city on Earth. Nothing bad will happen to you here unless you do it to yourself.
221: 2012-04-22: A man on the street in Toyko just introduced me to Happy Science and the teachings of Master Ryuho Okawa http://t.co/EUfGSqDY
222: 2012-04-17: Imagine a world without alcohol. How would people socialize? How could love possibly happen?
223: 2012-04-12: Happiness is a nearly empty Megabus. http://t.co/SMzd23fJ
224: 2012-04-09: RT @MJMcKean: A happy 84th to the great Tom Lehrer.
225: 2012-04-08: "A man doesn't know what happiness is until he gets married, and then it's too late."
226: 2012-04-04: RT @DalaiLama: An inflated sense of self-importance deflects us from the inner peace and happiness we seek and affects those around us n ...
227: 2012-04-03: Although I don't believe in God, I still believe "everything happens for a reason". That's apophenia at work.
228: 2012-04-02: If you want to quit a bad habit, you either do it now or never. If you put it off, then it's not going to happen.
229: 2012-04-01: Happiness is a dog/cat/human sleeping soundly on my bed, slowly pushing me off.
230: 2012-03-31: If a little of something makes you happy, that doesn't necessarily mean a lot of the same thing will make you more happy.
231: 2012-03-31: RT @TheBosha: So cute how the commercials show vegetables next to the Hamburger Helper on the plate as if that's ever, ever happened.
232: 2012-03-29: Every bride's worst nightmare! (But, believe me, it happens to grooms, too.) http://t.co/vTTsRji7
233: 2012-03-27: If plants had remained grasses, everyone would have been happy, but no. Some grew into trees to get more sun, then everyone had to get tall.
234: 2012-03-24: @xtinewu Pix or it didn't happen!
235: 2012-03-22: "Someday" usually never happens.
236: 2012-03-22: @LetsGo2TheBeach Wuss! Then "someday" probably won't happen.
237: 2012-03-16: When you are hungry, the taste of food makes you happy, but that doesn't mean more food will make you more happy.
238: 2012-03-15: RT @philosophytweet: There is in the worst of fortune the best of chances for a happy change.- Euripides
239: 2012-03-14: @xtinewu You could be a Barney and sing a happy tune. "I love you, you love me." You could get the whole First Class cabin singing!
240: 2012-03-07: American hedonism is based on the theory that more money and fame will buy more happiness.
241: 2012-03-07: Las Vegas Family Court is reassuring to me because it never changes. I can come back after years and know exactly what is happening.
242: 2012-03-06: Life is a combination of taking control and letting things happen. Wisdom lies in deciding which one is appropriate now.
243: 2012-03-03: Don't worry be happy die sooner.
244: 2012-03-02: "Congratulations! I'm so happy for you!" usually carries a bit of sadness and regret.
245: 2012-02-26: If you expect to do things, you have to initiate them right now. At least set the wheels in motion, or those things will never happen.
246: 2012-02-26: Inertia is when you keep doing something you know isn't good for you. You say, "I'll change later"—which of course doesn't happen.
247: 2012-02-24: The trouble with any "happy pill" is its temporary. For lasting happiness, you must create external circumstances that sustain it.
248: 2012-02-24: @Olivia_Sarai @xtinewu Meth does a nice little job of that!... But even without side effects, a "happy pill" is giving you a false reading.
249: 2012-02-24: If there was a chemical potion that made you happy regardless of your life circumstances, would you take it? Why or why not?
250: 2012-02-22: Look closely and you'll see something strange. Children. Playing outdoors! Rarely happens these days. http://t.co/OklQAIrn
251: 2012-02-12: About an hour from Whitehorse. Not a lot happening. (@ Teslin) [pic]: http://t.co/K9uiwBd2
252: 2012-02-08: I just registered a new website, http://t.co/50uwnRhA to record the happy birth of this new word. It's a boy! (or is it a girl?)
253: 2012-01-25: Hey, West Coast! Check out the moon just after sunset. A spooky sliver. Happens every month but still cool!
254: 2012-01-24: It is hard to tell good fortune from bad while it is happening. It depends on what you do with it.
255: 2012-01-21: Twin Peaks fun fact: Killer BOB was a production set dresser who happened to catch David Lynch's attention: http://t.co/k8AaTCD4
256: 2012-01-21: If your gas tank is nearly empty, your car will stop. The uncertainty of exactly where doesn't change the certainty it will happen.
257: 2012-01-16: I never had a previous interest in getting an all-over tan, but now seems like the right time. Hang out for an hour or so, see what happens.
258: 2012-01-15: Excessive neediness is a block to relationships but so is the claim of complete happiness and self-sufficiency.
259: 2012-01-14: You gain a consistent brain by investing time in it, by ruminating for extended periods on what has happened to you.
260: 2012-01-10: Successful relationships don't just happen. They are designed and constructed.
261: 2012-01-10: Romantic bonding can happen between partners who have nothing in common otherwise. That's when you got trouble brewing.
262: 2012-01-06: Surfing is 99% waiting for the right wave, then when it happens it must be like sex because people spend so much of their lives on it.
263: 2012-01-01: Why think about human suffering when you can watch happy shows on TV?
264: 2011-12-22: Some of history's most acclaimed leaders were merely figureheads who happened to be at the bow of the ship when it was turning.
265: 2011-12-12: Happiness is logarithmic, not linear. If $1 million make you happy, it doesn't follow the $10 million will make you 10 times happier.
266: 2011-12-12: Discovery is unpredictable but not random. It happens mainly when we invest in exploration.
267: 2011-12-11: Being happy right now isn't enough. There's a bigger cycle at work and you've got to understand it to avoid unhappiness in the future.
268: 2011-12-10: Here's a crazy idea: Let's give guns to all the dysfunctional people and see what happens. Oh wait, that's America! http://t.co/1SLXptFX
269: 2011-12-09: There are many forms of child abuse, but among the worst is making them a child star. The adult outcome is rarely happy.
270: 2011-12-07: Happy Pearl Harbor Day! It's not just about WWII but a day to celebrate sneak attacks of all kinds.
271: 2011-12-06: Just because a little of something makes you happy doesn't mean a lot of the same thing will make you more happy.
272: 2011-12-06: RT @washingtonpost: What happens in the U.S. if the euro zone fails? It won’t be pretty. http://t.co/ByJWAzy4
273: 2011-12-05: It is impossible to communicate with someone who is totally happy.
274: 2011-12-05: .@Zylaw we are on quite the elitist roll with this thread of tweets, aren't we?!! <== This just happens to be what we tweeted one year ago.
275: 2011-12-04: Dogs smile not with their mouth but their tail. If that thing is swishing back and forth, you got a happy pooch! http://t.co/QoMyHFnI
276: 2011-12-03: A primo sleeping airport thanks to one well-padded lounge. Couldn't be happier! [pic]: http://t.co/PXI3ruBY
277: 2011-12-02: Canadian accidentally gets appointed Italian Minister of Agriculture http://t.co/9p0bMwlU <== Happened to me once. So embarrassing!
278: 2011-12-02: Believing in a divine plan is a useful fiction to guide you through life. Whatever happens, good or bad, you ask, "What's the plan here?"
279: 2011-12-01: @xtinewu Pirouettes — iPhone video or it didn't happen.
280: 2011-11-30: Given a credit card, most people will use it to delay painful but inevitable life changes. Change will still happen but now you're indebted.
281: 2011-11-25: To find what makes you happy, you must experiment and test your own limits. No advice from others will suffice. You must seek your own data.
282: 2011-11-24: @cottonmouth1 "....Happy Thanksgiving, Mr. Bad....wherever you are...." <== Thank you for caring! Location attached.
283: 2011-11-19: Same old story: The drunk zoo visitor climbed into the lion habitat and was eaten. Happens all the time. Move along please!
284: 2011-11-16: It takes courage both to be creative and to move with it when it happens in a way you weren't expecting.
285: 2011-11-13: I wouldn't be happy if I didn't have train tracks nearby. (@ Motel 6) http://t.co/wOraTEXs
286: 2011-11-10: You didn't cause the earthquake, but you are responsible for preparing for it and for what you do after it happens.
287: 2011-11-10: Existentialism says you are responsible for everything that happens to you. Everything!
288: 2011-11-10: Existentialism is big on choice. That's all you have. You can choose wisely or poorly, and you alone responsible for what happens.
289: 2011-11-10: Truth lies in testing the world, seeing what happens and modifying your actions accordingly.
290: 2011-11-03: So what will happen in a few weeks when Greece can't pay its police and army and its government ceases to function? This is unfathomable!
291: 2011-10-31: So happy to be able to shoot people again!
292: 2011-10-31: @xtinewu Accidents happen. :-( ... At least you're making a fresh start. Virtual instruments are much easier to maintain.
293: 2011-10-29: RT @trevlutz: More that just memory floods back. Even stuff that DIDN'T happen gets remembered.
294: 2011-10-23: Defective toilet. I keep pushing the spot indicated but nothing happens. FB photo: http://t.co/CIf6UUxR
295: 2011-10-23: The real test of your creative drive is whether you keep doing it after you're fat and happy.
296: 2011-10-21: The trouble with disaster plans is they prepare you for the last disaster, not the one that actually happens.
297: 2011-10-20: People, like dogs, are happiest when they have a mission and are surrounded by a structured environment that tells then how to pursue it.
298: 2011-10-20: It had to happen: "Occupy Area 51" http://t.co/2KVf3CZF
299: 2011-10-16: Protesting an economic crisis is about as effective as protesting an earthquake after it has happened.
300: 2011-10-15: Success does not matter as much as what happens after it.
301: 2011-10-09: @nainysahani "Almost fires" don't count. Pix or it didn't happen ;)
302: 2011-10-08: I think it's adorable when people put on matching uniforms and jog or bike together. Happens mainly in Canada.
303: 2011-09-19: Nice people may become too focused on making people happy in the present without grasping the complex requirements of long-term niceness.
304: 2011-09-18: "Don't make decisions when you're angry. Don't make promises when you're happy."
305: 2011-09-17: If you are counting on people making rational decisions, think again. That rarely happens outside of math problems.
306: 2011-09-15: I have no idea what happens in a "Family Ass Restroom". Frankly, I don't want to know. http://t.co/tHpHJTU5
307: 2011-09-12: Saw Rise of the Planet of the Apes last night. Happens to have taken place where I'm standing now. Spoiler alert: The monkeys win.
308: 2011-08-13: Funny is fun when it happens on its own but a prison when people expect it from you.
309: 2011-08-13: Giving people things does not make them happy. For true satisfaction, they have to work for what they get.
310: 2011-08-12: RT @CrankyPappy: Money doesn't buy happiness. But not owing money is like a down payment.
311: 2011-08-10: RT @the_anastasia: Don't you hate it when you run into an old friend and they're not happy to see you and ask you why you're hiding in t ...
312: 2011-08-06: "There is no evidence for the claim that owning a pet makes you happier, healthier or live longer." http://bit.ly/rkKnOG
313: 2011-08-03: Advertising is fraud that happens to be legal because the lies are only implied not explicitly stated.
314: 2011-07-30: 99% of all crime is opportunistic. It happens because the victim provides the criminal with an easy and obvious opportunity.
315: 2011-07-27: A true autodidact, when stuck in school, refuses to go at the pace of the teacher but jumps ahead in the text to find out what happens next.
316: 2011-07-26: Petty theft happens mainly where druggies can patrol in anonymity.
317: 2011-07-18: @trixieboots We're all suffering sympathetic labor pains. Let's make this happen!
318: 2011-07-16: The wise recognize their own delusions based on data alone. They don't wait for catastrophe but change before it happens.
319: 2011-07-12: Automotive existentialism. Indeed, death or serious injury WILL OCCUR. It will happen to us all sooner or later. http://twitpic.com/5p0gtb
320: 2011-07-11: .@Zen_Bubba "Would the plural of Bigfoot be Bigfoots or Bigfeet?" <== You should be happy enough to find one, let alone plural.
321: 2011-07-11: RT @DalaiLama: Whether we like it or not, we're all connected, and it is unthinkable to be happy all by oneself.
322: 2011-07-10: The foundation of all great art is irony—the opposite happening from what is normally expected.
323: 2011-07-10: When bad things happen to Rupert Murdoch, schadenfreude is not inappropriate.
324: 2011-07-10: "Love, compassion and concern for others are real sources of happiness." <== Latest from the @DalaiLama Automatic Tweet Generator.
325: 2011-07-08: @xtinewu Photos or it didn't happen.
326: 2011-07-03: Funny, when it happens on its own, is fun. Funny on demand is not fun.
327: 2011-07-02: Creativity can happen only where you allow it to.
328: 2011-07-02: You can't force creativity, but you can arrange your life so you are free to follow new ideas when they happen.
329: 2011-07-01: You want a Zombie Apocalypse? Legalize hard drugs and see what happens.
330: 2011-06-16: The burden of too many choices is the cost of evaluating them. Limited choice often makes us happier. http://tiny.ly/b6PW via @quippdPsych
331: 2011-06-13: RT @NinelleEfremova: We make our own destiny. We make our own happiness. We make ourselves. Make yourself.
332: 2011-05-10: You don't go into a poor neighborhood and give out money. It's not the joy you bring that matters but what happens after you're gone.
333: 2011-05-08: It's just one little baby. I'll raise him in my spare time. He'll be no problem at all! #happymothersday
334: 2011-05-06: You can't plan on opportunities—They happen when they will.—but you can plan on being ready for opportunities.
335: 2011-05-06: Your chief control over opportunity is recognizing it when it happens and seeing it where others don't.
336: 2011-05-06: Neurotic people can't stand happiness. Whenever it intrudes into their life they find some way to sabotage it.
337: 2011-05-04: RT @GreatestQuotes: "Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions." - Dalai Lama
338: 2011-05-04: RT @DalaiLama: The ultimate source of a happy life is the attention we pay to our inner values.
339: 2011-05-01: Never underestimate the ability of the addict to sabotage any good thing that happens to him.
340: 2011-04-29: So happy to NOT be watching the Royal Wedding right now, but pleased to read your tweets about it!
341: 2011-04-29: @ThatsWright "Just got carded buying lotto tickets." <== Are you going to wish for good fortune or make it happen?
342: 2011-04-29: Becoming a movie star or billionaire may be impossible, but achieving long term happiness isn't.
343: 2011-04-26: People in stable relationships may be happier, but their creative initiative also drops. They're less likely to take chances or push limits.
344: 2011-04-16: Many dream of foreign travel but few actually pull it off. They invent too many barriers for themselves to ever allow it to happen.
345: 2011-04-12: If the Watergate break-in had happened today, would there be anyone to run it down?l
346: 2011-04-10: People worship famous actors because like winning the lottery it can happen to anyone.
347: 2011-04-08: There are a lot more important things in life than money. To be happy, you need "enough" money, but being rich won't make you any happier.
348: 2011-04-07: Childhood gave us a set of assumptions about what is required for a happy life—most of which turn out to be bullshit!
349: 2011-04-05: Whenever I hear of the Israeli army killing civilians in some botched operation, I think, "That's what happens when you give guns to teens."
350: 2011-04-03: The good news: People can change! The bad news: It's not going to happen on your schedule or while you're enabling them.
351: 2011-04-02: Welcome to Camp Happy! We want everyone to be happy here. Anyone who isn't happy will be taken out and shot. So by all means BE HAPPY!
352: 2011-03-31: If the gas gauge says "E" and you don't fuel up, the car will stop. You don't know exactly where and when, only that it will happen.
353: 2011-03-30: If invading aliens had any brains, they'd disable our electronics first. Then everyone would be like "Huh? What happened? What do we do?"
354: 2011-03-29: People are driven by what they THINK will make them happy. Doesn't always work out that way, especially for decisions made in the moment.
355: 2011-03-27: The death spiral begins when you think you've found happiness and decide to nail it down with a contract.
356: 2011-03-26: Happiness should not be confused with euphoria, which is more like the chemical high of drugs. Happiness involves lasting satisfaction.
357: 2011-03-26: All of us are manic-depressives. Our lives are controlled by poor decisions made in our mania—which we called "happiness" at the time.
358: 2011-03-26: RT @pympdr: If you are wondering what happens when beauty meets the brain, follow @lolahayes. You can thank me later.
359: 2011-03-26: You can't sit around waiting to be rescued. Ain't gonna happen. You got to do it yourself!
360: 2011-03-20: If a bacterium divides every few hours, math predicts it will soon take over the world, but resource limits guarantee this won't happen.
361: 2011-03-20: Bubbles happen when investors start looking around at what others are doing instead of understanding the value of what they're buying.
362: 2011-03-17: One man's Paradise is another's boring nothing-ever-happens-here home.
363: 2011-03-15: Facebook is the place for happy thoughts and non-controversial postings—obviously because everyone you know in real life is on it.
364: 2011-03-15: eudaimonic well-being—n. happiness that comes from engaging in meaningful activity. WSJ http://t.co/hTQXN9z via @NewMindMirror
365: 2011-03-14: "If it makes you happy, it can't be that bad. If it makes you happy, then why the hell are you so sad?" #existentialsonglyrics
366: 2011-03-13: It's always suspicious when the city/country/religion that one happens to have been born into turns out to be the greatest in the world.
367: 2011-03-13: @RhodiHawk "Foggy sunrise on Buffalo Bayou." <== Pix or it didn't happen!
368: 2011-03-11: It's a law of nature: A chicken will shit. You don't know exactly where or when, but it will happen.
369: 2011-03-11: We are all riding our own personal Titanic, obsessing over details on board while missing what's happening to the whole ship
370: 2011-03-07: Life is 50% controlling your own future and 50% taking advantage of the things that happen to you that you have no control over.
371: 2011-03-07: "Things happen for a reason" is a useful philosophy to live by, whether or not it is true.
372: 2011-03-07: Synchronicity may or may not be real, but if it seems to happen, we should take heed and use it to our advantage.
373: 2011-03-06: Objects can't make you happy. Only achievements can. Objects are valuable only as tools to help you achieve something meaningful.
374: 2011-03-04: Just because a little of something makes you happy doesn't mean a lot of the same thing will make you more happy. {9/23}
375: 2011-03-03: When ideas spew out of your brain, it usually happens fast. You need @HootSuite to spread them out and avoid overwhelming your readers.
376: 2011-03-03: Some of the worst things that happen to you turn out in the long run to be the best things that could happen to you.
377: 2011-03-01: RT @SethMacFarlane: Really want this to happen sometime:
378: 2011-02-23: If ten people witness a car crash, you'll get ten different stories about what happened, but all will agree that a crash occurred.
379: 2011-02-19: Most people are happy enough just to find a parking spot. Once they have one they never leave.
380: 2011-02-18: If you are going to be ripped off as a tourist, it will probably happen when you first arrive in a new city, when you are still disoriented.
381: 2011-02-18: Every exotic travel location is someone else's boring, nothing-ever-happens-here home.
382: 2011-02-12: @tammyphinney "Car broken into." <== Happened to me in Vancouver a few months ago. It builds character and encourages data efficiency.
383: 2011-02-11: The most dangerous thing in the world is to believe you have found permanent happiness.
384: 2011-02-07: CORRECTION: Beauty pageants culminate with one girl saying, "Oh my God, I won!" and fifty others pretending to be SO happy for her.
385: 2011-02-07: I guess the cheese people are happy now.
386: 2011-02-07: The people with the cheeses on their heads don't look happy.
387: 2011-02-06: What other people consider success has little to do with what makes you happy. That's a private journey.
388: 2011-02-06: RT @GreatestQuotes: "He who would travel happily must travel light." - Antoine de Saint-Exupery
389: 2011-02-01: Is synchronicity a paranormal phenomenon or merely coincidence? It doesn't matter! When it happens, use it!
390: 2011-02-01: @beingtheo "You'll love having dinner with my sister. Unless the different food items on her plate happen to touch each other.” <== OCD, eh?
391: 2011-01-31: Nice to voice your support for Eqypt, but the real issue is what happens next. Revolutions have a poor track record of restoring democracy.
392: 2011-01-31: "Religious belief is not a precondition either of ethical conduct or of happiness." @DalaiLama <== Sometimes the dude gets it right!
393: 2011-01-27: "Reverse engineering", in any narrative artform, is starting with what you want to achieve, then back-filling the details to make it happen.
394: 2011-01-24: @hjamess "It doesn't happen often, but you're wrong about entertainment BadDalai." <== How so? It's real experience vs fake experience.
395: 2011-01-23: Happiness, in the long term, is a personality trait you either have or you don't. Circumstances are largely irrelevant.
396: 2011-01-23: To those who are used to misery, happiness triggers euphoria, which often leads to bad decisions that bring the misery back.
397: 2011-01-23: Some people are only happy when they're miserable.
398: 2011-01-18: @joelofarc "What happens if I want to learn how to be a teacher?" <== Observe the behavior of your teachers and do the opposite.
399: 2011-01-17: Doesn't happen often, but we have blocked a new follower: @gandalfphoto. Pretty photos, but limited range. Not pornographic—or is it?
400: 2011-01-13: It is during periods of happiness and prosperity that the biggest mistakes are made.
401: 2011-01-08: People are suckers for correlation, seeking the superficial symbols of health, happiness and achievement instead the causative actions.
402: 2011-01-07: RT @DalaiLama: Happiness does not come about only due to external circumstances; it mainly derives from inner attitudes.
403: 2011-01-07: Numbness happens when you do the same things over and over, staying within a narrow band of behavior. Weeks go by, then years and decades.
404: 2011-01-06: HD Delusion #7: In video, as in real life, the brain retains only what happened, not the details of the scene, so HD is forgotten instantly.
405: 2011-01-03: The limits of knowledge: You cannot know what consciousness is, what happens after death or why you are here, but you must proceed anyway.
406: 2011-01-01: Happiness is not money, love or power (as long as you have a little of each). Happiness is pushing your own development to the next level.
407: 2011-01-01: What most people take for happiness is merely numbness: the absence of feeling and growth, dull repetition, a state of suspended animation.
408: 2010-12-30: @ValdemarLethin "Wow, who's not burdened by politics?" (re: pot) <== Oops! Did we stumble into politics there? Sorry, won't happen again!
409: 2010-12-25: JERUSALEM — Christmas party at the Abraham Hostel, happening RIGHT NOW! Come on down! FB Album: http://j.mp/ffpfVw
410: 2010-12-25: It is useful to believe in fate in retrospect ("Everything happens for a reason") but not in the future ("I am powerless to change it").
411: 2010-12-24: RT @JousinPalafox: @DalaiLama I apreciate your advice about happiness but you should follow @BadDalaiLama, because believe it or not he ...
412: 2010-12-15: "neurotic — those who tend to view life as a state invented so that bad things could happen to them." http://j.mp/gJFmSa Sounds borderline.
413: 2010-12-15: To be happily married, it helps to be deluded. Time: http://j.mp/gTwxj8
414: 2010-12-12: Some of history's most acclaimed leaders were merely figureheads who happened to be at the bow of the ship when it was turning.
415: 2010-12-10: Discovery is unpredictable but not random. It happens mainly when we invest in exploration.
416: 2010-12-09: news—n. an inexhaustible supply of daily happenings of little significance, designed chiefly to titillate and appall.
417: 2010-12-08: The Rip Van Winkle Effect is when you step into a career then step put of it 20 years later wondering, "What? Huh? What happened?"
418: 2010-12-07: We would be happy to hear your political opinions if you are running for public office and plan to use them. Otherwise, it's just hot air.
419: 2010-12-02: Insight: recognizing the defects in ones own behavior and changing course. Exceedingly rare but magical when it happens.
420: 2010-11-30: “My right to happiness carries no more weight than others'.” MRT @DalaiLama — Dude's talking about object constancy.
421: 2010-11-24: To find what makes you happy, you must experiment and test your own limits. No advice from others will suffice. You must seek your own data.
422: 2010-11-19: Paranoia is what keeps us from recognizing good opportunities when they happen to fall into our lap.
423: 2010-11-15: Learning doesn't happen when you experience new things but when you recall and analyze those experiences later.
424: 2010-11-11: Happiness should not be confused with euphoria. Drugs can give you euphoria, but happiness lasts longer.
425: 2010-11-09: Once a need is met, exceeding the need doesn't make you any happier. Instead, your attention turns to other unsatisfied needs.
426: 2010-11-08: RT @GreatestQuotes: "What is important is not what happens to us, but how we respond to what happens to us." - Jean-Paul Sartre
427: 2010-11-08: If $1 million makes you happy, that doesn't mean $10 million will make you 10 times as happy.
428: 2010-11-07: RT @GreatestQuotes: "He who would travel happily must travel light." - Antoine de Saint-Exupery
429: 2010-11-01: Isn't it amazing how the religion you were born into just happens to be the right one? That's the magic of faith!
430: 2010-10-31: Crime is not random. It happens mainly when you give the criminal an obvious opportunity and guarantee him anonymity.
431: 2010-10-29: People with a conflict of interest rarely see themselves as having one. Their own needs just happen to coincide with their constituents'.
432: 2010-10-22: When you are young and striving for glory, the worst thing that can happen to you is finding it.
433: 2010-10-20: Our culture gives us a list of things we must do to be happy. We try and fail, which gives us a chance to try again, ignoring the list.
434: 2010-10-14: Another truism from the Good @DalaiLama: I believe that at all levels of society...the key to a better, happier world is greater compassion.
435: 2010-10-12: "No" can be the starting point of happiness. Once you give or receive it, new options will open up and you can move on with your life.
436: 2010-10-09: If you have experienced misery all your life and it happens to go away, you will probably create new misery to replace it.
437: 2010-10-08: Money in excess of ones needs is more an enabler of dysfunction than a key to happiness.
438: 2010-10-04: RT @KilroyCafe: "If you want a happy ending, that depends, of course, on where you stop your story." -- Orson Wells
439: 2010-10-02: Adult personality cannot be changed from the outside, especially within the scope of romance. Change may happen, but only after you're gone.
440: 2010-10-01: Happiness is not a permanent condition. It must be constantly renegotiated and cannot be nailed down by any form of contract.
441: 2010-09-27: If you look around you and see only happiness, you aren't looking very deeply.
442: 2010-09-24: Happiness should not be confused with euphoria. Drugs can give you euphoria, but happiness lasts longer.
443: 2010-09-23: Just because a little of something makes you happy doesn't mean a lot of the same thing will make you more happy.
444: 2010-09-23: Bearing children is the ultimate Frankenstein experiment. Let's mix up our genes, throw the dice and see what happens!
445: 2010-09-22: "I love you. You love me. We're a happy family." — Barney the Purple Dinosaur (channeling the Good @DalaiLama)
446: 2010-09-22: Success can be a barrier to growth, since it tends to freeze you at whatever state you were in when it happened.
447: KilroyCafe: 2010-11-29: Frank Drebin: "Well, you'll have plenty of time to think that over in Statesville Prison." (which is where I happen to be)
448: KilroyCafe: 2010-10-17: RT @GreatestQuotes: "He who would travel happily must travel light." - Antoine de Saint-Exupery
449: KilroyCafe: 2010-10-17: Photo: "Pray Until Something Happens." Colorado Springs. http://j.mp/a9Mnd9
450: KilroyCafe: 2010-10-01: RT @BadDalaiLama: Happiness is not a permanent condition. It must be constantly renegotiated and cannot be nailed down by any form of co ...
451: KilroyCafe: 2010-09-23: RT @BadDalaiLama: Bearing children is the ultimate Frankenstein experiment. Let's mix up our genes, throw the dice and see what happens!
452: KilroyCafe: 2010-09-14: Frustration happens, but anger is a choice. It proves your narcissism and lack of control and rarely gains you what you hope it will.
453: KilroyCafe: 2010-09-10: Running out of gas is symbolic of most of life's disasters: preventable but non-negotiable once it happens.
454: KilroyCafe: 2010-09-09: If one has been wronged, one wants to cause equal pain to the person who did it, but this can't change what has already happened.
455: KilroyCafe: 2010-09-07: Money improves happiness, but only to a point. RT @MailOnline: Key to happiness? Start with £50k a year salary http://bit.ly/bCqxjq
456: KilroyCafe: 2010-08-29: The first thing that happens when you become a professional musician is you lose your hearing — both literally and figuratively.
457: KilroyCafe: 2010-08-28: Success is one of the greatest barriers to growth. It tends to freeze you at whatever state you were in when it happened.
458: KilroyCafe: 2010-08-25: "Consumer confidence" should not be confused with happiness, which may improve as people realize, "Hey, we don't need this stuff anyway!"
459: KilroyCafe: 2010-08-25: The news is a convenient addiction to distract you from how little is happening in your own life.
460: KilroyCafe: 2010-08-15: RVs are for people who enjoy the free-wheeling, happy-go-lucky, devil-may-care lifestyle as long as they can take all their stuff with them.
461: KilroyCafe: 2010-08-13: Most of life is spent either waiting for things to happen or coping with the mistakes of the past. Peak performance in the present is rare.
462: KilroyCafe: 2010-08-12: Happiness could be defined as the absence of woes, the achievement of goals or getting the most out of life with the resources you have.
463: KilroyCafe: 2010-08-09: If something makes you feel good now, repeating it 10x won't make you 10x happier, yet people make permanent plans based on this assumption.
464: KilroyCafe: 2010-08-09: Happiness is logarithmic, not linear. Satisfaction diminishes with repetition. Only continuous innovation and growth keep the soul alive.
465: KilroyCafe: 2010-08-06: When something unusual happens, many will turn their heads. Few will change course to investigate.
466: KilroyCafe: 2010-07-30: Video: Finding Happiness in Timisoara, Romania. http://youtu.be.co/xu8xAo_Smco - Changing trains on the way to Transylvania.
467: KilroyCafe: 2010-07-13: Trying to be funny is a sad business. Better to be meaningful and let funny happen as it may.
468: KilroyCafe: 2010-07-08: In Hell, they make you ride a jam-packed city bus across Queens—forever! They promise to get you to LaGuardia Airport, but it never happens.
469: KilroyCafe: 2010-06-27: If something makes you happy once, it won't necessarily make you happy again when repeated, because by then your needs will have changed.
470: KilroyCafe: 2010-06-19: Sleep is where a lot of serious work gets done. We may not know exactly what's happening, but it's as important as digestion.
471: KilroyCafe: 2010-06-19: Amazing there can be so much oil pooled underground that it flows out like this. Surely, this must have happened naturally in the past. #BP
472: KilroyCafe: 2010-06-01: In the world of vapid pseudo-news, weather is the most reliable. It's always happening somewhere!
473: KilroyCafe: 2010-06-01: Today's hot new technology is tomorrow's garage sale junk. Just hope you get enough use from it before that happens.
474: KilroyCafe: 2010-05-31: Objects can't really make you happy. Only achievements can. Objects are valuable only when they help you achieve something important.
475: KilroyCafe: 2010-05-24: Ain't it amazing how the religion you were born into just happens to be the right one. That's the magic of faith!
476: KilroyCafe: 2010-05-08: My favorite word: "Organic" — something that flows naturally from the unique circumstances and resources that happen to be available to you.
477: KilroyCafe: 2010-04-09: "Old" is the state of having already given up on life. For some, it happens at an early age; others never get there.
478: KilroyCafe: 2010-03-31: Bearing children is the ultimate Frankenstein experiment. Let's mix up our genes, throw the dice and see what happens.
479: KilroyCafe: 2010-03-25: Happiness should not be confused with euphoria. Drugs can give you euphoria, but true happiness lasts longer.
480: KilroyCafe: 2010-03-15: If you look around you and see only happiness, you aren't looking very deeply.
481: KilroyCafe: 2010-03-13: Success for the wrong reasons — for fakery and luck — is the worst thing that can happen to someone. He will use it to self-destruct.
482: KilroyCafe: 2010-03-10: Sex is the world's most boring topic. If you don't happen to be in the mood, it's just stupid.
483: KilroyCafe: 2010-03-07: Money in excess of ones needs is more an enabler of dysfunction than a key to happiness.
484: KilroyCafe: 2010-02-27: "True happiness involves the full use of one's power and talents." — Douglas Pagels via @davidvgoliath
485: KilroyCafe: 2010-02-27: If a little of something makes you happy, it doesn’t necessarily follow that twice as much of the same thing will make you twice as happy.
486: KilroyCafe: 2010-02-27: There are many who will wish for something but few who will take the steps necessary to make it happen.
487: KilroyCafe: 2010-02-24: Bonding happens. Even a sheik with a vast harem has his one favorite concubine, and it's her wits more than her looks that got her there.
488: KilroyCafe: 2010-02-13: Wanna hang here, can't be no square. Gotta be hip. Gotta be groovy. Gotta be plugged into what's happen'n, man! Dig it?
489: KilroyCafe: 2010-02-07: Best lyrics of the century (so far): "If it makes you happy, it can't be that bad. If it makes you happy, then why the hell are you so sad?"
490: KilroyCafe: 2010-02-06: REM Sleep is a very active time. Breathing is deep, heart rate up. The brain is awash with oxygen. Something important is happening!
491: KilroyCafe: 2010-02-03: Adult personality cannot be changed from the outside, especially within the scope of romance. Change may happen, but only after you're gone.
492: KilroyCafe: 2010-01-30: Happiness is not a permanent condition. It must be constantly renegotiated and cannot be nailed down in the future by any form of contract.
493: KilroyCafe: 2010-01-25: We wanted you prisoners to be happy, sedated, non-confrontational. That's why we gave you television.
494: KilroyCafe: 2010-01-24: So if a disinfectant claims to kill "99.99% of germs", what happens next? The remaining .01% reproduce and BREED STRONGER GERMS!
495: KilroyCafe: 2010-01-23: If $1 million would make you happy, it doesn't necessarily follow that $2 million would make you twice as happy. Often the opposite!
496: KilroyCafe: 2010-01-23: The main engine of economic growth is rich people who falsely believe that getting even richer will make them happier.
497: KilroyCafe: 2010-01-20: There is nothing happy about entertainment. It is pornography without the sex, exploitative of everyone involved.
498: KilroyCafe: 2010-01-15: Have you ever looked up at the stars and thought about all the space debris in Earth orbit and what's going to happen to it? Me too!
499: KilroyCafe: 2010-01-10: Happiness is walking into a high-end electronics store and seeing absolutely nothing you want, even if you had unlimited money.
500: KilroyCafe: 2010-01-06: Personal factoid: In all of 2009, I watched only two television shows all the way through, both silly UFO shows that I happened to be in.
501: KilroyCafe: 2010-01-02: "To be without some of the things you want is an indispensable part of happiness." - Bertrand Russell
502: KilroyCafe: 2009-12-29: "If you want a happy ending, that depends, of course, on where you stop your story." -- Orson Wells
503: KilroyCafe: 2009-12-19: All good fiction involves some form of magic. Things will happen that are impossible in real life, but the resolution must be real.
504: KilroyCafe: 2009-12-17: Special effects be damned! What drives a movie is the characters and what happens to them. The rest is forgotten quickly.
505: KilroyCafe: 2009-12-10: "Lost Cat: Reward" in Jackson, Wyoming. Photo: http://bit.ly/7XyXa6 - I think I know what happened to little Fluffy!
506: KilroyCafe: 2009-12-01: The Jewish Mother Syndrome (Greek, Italian, etc.) is part of a pan-cultural disorder: Mothers Who Will Never Be Happy No Matter What You Do.
507: KilroyCafe: 2009-11-25: Aren't you lucky that of all the religious sects and beliefs in the world, you happened to be born into the right one!
508: KilroyCafe: 2009-11-12: What will happen to your Facebook etc after you die? NY Times: http://bit.ly/3FSzbe "Virtual Estates Lead to Real-World Headaches"
509: KilroyCafe: 2009-11-01: Most future happiness is a delusion. What we think will make us happy probably won't.
510: KilroyCafe: 2009-10-28: "convenient belief" - something you believe because it happens to support your own choices, although you'll probably invent other reasons.
511: KilroyCafe: 2009-09-23: People with a conflict of interest rarely perceive themselves as having one. Their own needs just happen to coincide with their client's.
512: KilroyCafe: 2009-09-10: My dental hygienist: "When I was single I had plenty of money, but now I'm married, two incomes, but no money. What happened?"
513: KilroyCafe: 2009-08-30: A bad marriage can limp along for years, as long as there are resources to support it. The crisis happens when the resources run out.
514: KilroyCafe: 2009-08-27: My worst personal crisis turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to me. It freed me to live again.
515: KilroyCafe: 2009-08-26: Photo Tip #2: SEPARATION OF ELEMENTS. Each person or other subject should be distinct from its surroundings. Move to make that happen!
516: KilroyCafe: 2009-07-25: Bad things happen when you insulate people from the effects of their own actions.
517: KilroyCafe: 2009-07-23: You thought something would make you happy, so you worked hard to attain it, only to find it wasn't what you thought it was.
518: KilroyCafe: 2009-07-22: Traveling in Northern Canada, I haven't seen the night in days. I'm sure it happens, but it's light when I go to sleep and when I wake up.
519: KilroyCafe: 2009-07-22: Religion is just another way of saying, "I am not responsible for what happens to me."
520: KilroyCafe: 2009-07-18: Most people spend most of their lives positioning themselves for a life that never happens. Then they die.
521: KilroyCafe: 2009-07-11: Whatever happens during sleep, you need it to put everything into perspective.
522: KilroyCafe: 2009-07-08: The easy way to deal with Sarah Palin is give her her own TV talk show. She'll be happy, out of politics and those who want to tune in, can.
523: KilroyCafe: 2009-07-05: If you could survey people who have experienced sudden wealth and visit them again 20 years later, the results would not be happy.
524: KilroyCafe: 2009-06-28: I'd be happy enough with some fava beans and a nice Chianti. (I'll skip the liver, thanks.)
525: KilroyCafe: 2009-06-26: "Pleasure may come from illusion, but happiness can come only of reality." - Chamfort via @linkibol
526: KilroyCafe: 2009-06-22: Once you see what is really going on in the world around you, life becomes bittersweet. There is no simple happiness.
527: KilroyCafe: 2009-06-22: Just because a little of something makes you happy doesn't mean a LOT of the same thing will make you MORE happy.
528: KilroyCafe: 2009-06-11: If a million dollars would make you happy, would 2 million make you twice as happy? No! There is no personal benefit in excess.
529: KilroyCafe: 2009-06-11: Living well and happily has little to do with what you own. It has everything to do with how well you spend your time.
530: KilroyCafe: 2009-06-11: Nothing mobilizes a community like responding to a tragedy after it has happened, but few will unite to prevent one.
531: KilroyCafe: 2009-06-08: When people feel they have been wronged, they don't just want justice; they want Judge Judy justice. It ain't gonna happen!
532: KilroyCafe: 2009-06-08: What happens to most people after marriage? They gain weight! Symbolic of the changes in the relationship, there's no incentive to be thin.
533: KilroyCafe: 2009-05-31: What happened to the gold tablets written in Reformed Egyptian after Joseph Smith translated the Book of Mormon from them? God took em back!
534: KilroyCafe: 2009-05-31: If you're starting a new religion, the best thing that can happen is to be persecuted. You can play the victim for millennia!
535: KilroyCafe: 2009-05-22: Loneliness/engulfment creates a cycle. You're desperate for attachment, but when it happens you say, "Get me outta here, I can't breathe!"
536: KilroyCafe: 2009-05-21: Existentialism is big on CHOICE. That's all you have. You can choose wisely or poorly, but you are always responsible for what happens.
537: KilroyCafe: 2009-05-14: OXYMORON ALERT: The fine print on the bottom of the ad says, "Drink Responsibly." Yeah, like when has that ever happened?
538: KilroyCafe: 2009-04-29: Oooo, the pandemic has been raised to LEVEL 5. You know, when I was a kid, 5 was the highest panic level. What happened? Panic inflation.
539: KilroyCafe: 2009-04-20: Not a 4-20 advocate. Tried it once; that was enough. I've got a good brain; it works well, and I'm happy with it. Why throw sand into it?
539 tweets found.

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