Glenn Campbell's tweet archive, searching for "alien"

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Dates: after but on or before format: 2013-11-07
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Also try official twitter search for "alien" in @BadDalaiLama - @KilroyCafe - @BadLamaArt. (Word must be exact. Includes reader replies but not BDL retweets.)

Searching the archives for both @BadDalaiLama and @KilroyCafe for Glenn Campbell's tweets. Click on date to view original tweet on Twitter. Search is based on the downloaded archive, which is updated about every two weeks, so this search may not include the most recent tweets. Multi-line tweets may not be complete in this listing. See our Twitter Overview for more info. Help give these tweets new life by retweeting the ones you like.

1: 2015-05-12: True fact about aliens: They would never abduct any of those people who claim to have been abducted. They have higher standards than that.
2: 2015-03-26: "Take us to your leader," said the aliens, so I sent them to Merkel.
3: 2015-03-17: RT @Peripatetia: Area 51 Alien Center and Brothel, Armagosa Junction, Nevada (now) 4x #Hyperlapse #video https://t.co/kSBv9efiAb
4: 2014-12-31: When the aliens land and want to negotiate with our planet, they'll probably go to Merkel.
5: 2014-12-16: Searching the galaxy for alien life, the worst thing may be finding it. Proudly presenting ourselves, it may swat us like a fly.
6: 2014-12-16: The universe may be teeming with life. Aliens may even have visited Earth. But that is irrelevant to my own life at present.
7: 2014-12-05: Aliens Are Probably Everywhere, Just Not Anywhere Near Humans http://t.co/pZNQMx9Q7t
8: 2014-11-16: If Scandinavia ruled the world, society would be just, the aliens could land, and Earth would already be part of the Galactic Federation.
9: 2014-10-28: Old guy, now dead, claims to have worked with alien craft at Area 51. Video, article and comments. https://t.co/kNVq98G5qm
10: 2014-09-21: If planet Earth consisted entirely of Scandinavia, the aliens could land without fear and Earth would join the Galactic Federation.
11: 2014-09-06: Invading aliens in the 1950s were bound to ask: "Why do you Earth women scream so much?" and "How do you have such cone-shaped breasts?"
12: 2014-08-28: A million UFO sightings—categorized, analyzed and documented on video—is worth less than a small sample of alien DNA.
13: 2014-05-21: UFO researchers are always frustrated by how well the aliens cover their tracks. It's like they weren't even there.
14: 2014-04-27: RT @nypost: Bill Clinton says that it's only a matter of time before he meets an alien. He's wrong http://t.co/4vAp2X4IUT
15: 2014-04-16: Bill Clinton saying very convincingly that there are no aliens at Area 51. On Jimmy Kimmel a week ago. http://t.co/lhxIxo0YMq
16: 2014-04-06: Rowell Walmart in 2009. One-stop shopping for all your alien needs. FB album: http://t.co/lSTNDvXrET
17: 2014-04-06: Rancher to alien: "Now you clean up this mess right away!" http://t.co/RGRydrJmDx
18: 2014-03-09: Dear aliens: No contact please! Keep your warp drives. We can't even handle our own technology. We don't need yours.
19: 2013-11-30: RT @TheBosha: If you or I didn't find Bigfoot, ghosts or aliens as often as these reality shows don't find Bigfoot, ghosts or aliens we'd l…
20: 2013-11-24: The first rule of getting what you want from life is: Don’t alienate your service providers!
21: 2013-10-05: The first rule of getting what you want from life: Don’t alienate your service providers!
22: 2013-09-17: If aliens created us and have been been visiting our planet ever since, that doesn't change a damn thing about what we have to do on Earth.
23: 2013-08-27: Dear sociopaths: You don't have to care about people. Just don't eat or alienate your service providers.
24: 2013-08-20: Einstein and Oppenheimer babble bureaucratically about alien contact in Top Secret document. http://t.co/DEPBeo1Pwk via @ohboywhatashot
25: 2013-07-21: Solution to the UFO mystery: An advanced race of alien cats. With laser pointers. Getting even.
26: 2013-06-29: Ambassador Merlyn Merlin II, Nevada's only alien lobbyist, departed Earth 12 years ago. http://t.co/dUyLztxpyp More https://t.co/r8QI4f0Nzy
27: 2013-05-14: The latest Star Trek movies are action packed, but there's something missing… an alien quality the TV series' had: intelligence!
28: 2013-05-02: Evidently, aliens preferred to visit Earth in the mid-20th Century, after World War II but before cell phones and video cameras.
29: 2013-04-13: @thexdoctorx I believe aliens are completely irrelevant to our life on Earth and are not the best use of my own limited time.
30: 2013-04-13: Attention UFO fans: The fact that something is secret does not imply aliens or conspiracies. There are plenty of human reasons for secrecy.
31: 2013-04-05: Warning to the aliens: Don't expect intelligence in the first human you meet. You'll have to run through quite a few.
32: 2013-04-04: Transgender surgery? Gimme a break! We are ALL trapped in alien bodies. Don't waste half a lifetime trying to fix yours.
33: 2013-02-19: It may be hard for the aliens to accept, but they have to face the truth: I don't care if they exist.
34: 2013-02-10: @lawnrocket That's freaky. I guess video games have potential, but the core young male audience just wants to KILL ALIENS.
35: 2013-01-25: The Prime Directive is not just for protection of indigenous cultures but also alien visitors, who can easily get in over their heads.
36: 2013-01-10: Solution to the UFO mystery: an advanced race of alien cats. With laser pointers. Getting even.
37: 2013-01-09: At least the aliens had the good sense to land only in the 1950s and 60s and not today when everyone has a video camera.
38: 2013-01-09: Aliens have not yet announced themselves on this planet, but it's not too soon to ask them to leave. Earth for Earthlings!
39: 2013-01-09: Dear aliens: The abductions that cannot be proven must end!
40: 2013-01-08: IN CASE OF ALIEN INVASION: Keep calm. Turn on the news. See the aliens. Turn OFF the news. Go back to whatever you were doing. Fuck aliens!
41: 2013-01-08: First rule of ufology: The aliens are always in the next hangar.
42: 2012-12-24: No alien implant or parasitic invasion is more insidious than the Christmas carol stuck in ones head.
43: 2012-12-13: God, aliens and psychic phenomena, if they exist, are keeping a low profile. Until they come out, we have to conduct our lives without them.
44: 2012-11-03: Attention Conspiracy Theorists: The fact that a bank has tight security does not imply a cover-up, conspiracy or alien presence. #area51
45: 2012-10-20: A classic alien abduction and a typical abductee. http://t.co/N5xYhTG6
46: 2012-10-08: RT @KilroyCafe: Among adult humans, curiosity is rare. They may notice an alien presence in their environment, but they won't change cou ...
47: 2012-08-24: I'm suffering from an extreme alien abduction deficit. Hundreds of nights alone in the desert and not a single (conscious) UFO encounter.
48: 2012-08-18: RT @laurenahayes: Insane RT: @benwakeling: A child's skull, before their milk teeth fall out. This is freakier than all Aliens combined ...
49: 2012-08-16: The most important responsibility of gods and aliens is to not give people false hope.
50: 2012-08-09: @cottonmouth1 Lucky the alien presence didn't detect me. (Probably because of all the noisy children all around me.)
51: 2012-08-09: Alien presence detected in caverns below Omaha! Scary 4-minute video shot yesterday http://t.co/MfQZO1VM
52: 2012-08-07: Bizarre Alien Train observed last night in Cheyenne, Wyoming (3-minute video) http://t.co/JJ37ynG9
53: 2012-07-07: You know in the movie "Alien" when they try to cut the alien off John Hurt's face but it just squeezes harder? That. #whyyoucantquitfacebook
54: 2012-07-02: If aliens landed in a field beside the highway, many motorists would turn their heads but few would stop their cars.
55: 2012-05-24: Most realistic crime show ever: "Jerk Detective". Cop is brilliant at solving crimes but his ego alienates everyone. New partner every week.
56: 2012-04-26: @RhodiHawk Could be an alien pod. If it explodes in your face it's only a matter of time before a lizard bursts out of your chest. #watchout
57: 2012-04-19: I feel totally at home in any place where I am an alien.
58: 2012-04-13: Alien sighting on this flight. http://t.co/bEjXy9TT
59: 2012-04-09: If aliens visiting Earth are a superior race, they will reveal themselves when they choose to. Until then, relax. Focus on earthly life.
60: 2012-04-06: RT @TheBosha: MEMO re: Ancient aliens
61: 2012-04-03: Another alien abduction. I get a lot of inquiries like this. http://t.co/pwintJuX
62: 2012-01-17: You gotta admire the aliens for their light touch. They're intervening in Earth affairs only when they have to, which is apparently never.
63: 2012-01-16: Take away clothes and sexual attraction and the human body is this weird, furless, gangly contraption. If I were an alien, I'd go "Eeeeek!"
64: 2012-01-16: My new philosophy blog entry: "Santa Claus and the Aliens: Charities that Don't Work" http://t.co/4ZUe542Q
65: 2012-01-15: Imagine aliens landing on Earth, doing a song and dance, then getting back in their spaceship and leaving. That's what most charity is.
66: 2012-01-14: I find it hard to take aliens seriously when they use a fixed-pitch Courier font. (A sans-serif Futura? Maybe.) http://t.co/s8HpHxcG
67: 2011-12-28: UFO Welcome Center, Bowman, SC. (The aliens are operating on a different timescale than us, so you must be patient.) http://t.co/G0CTZeXF
68: 2011-12-28: Waiting for the aliens to arrive... and waiting and waiting... (@ UFO WELCOME CENTER) [pic]: http://t.co/mGsGjzdD
69: 2011-12-21: I am a UFO agnostic. If aliens exist, I'm just grateful that they're staying out of our business.
70: 2011-12-06: Look at how Earth has handled global warming or the economic crisis and you can imagine the political paralysis if aliens landed.
71: 2011-12-06: The most frightening thing about alien contact is that we, as humans, would be totally incapable of a coordinated planetary response to it.
72: 2011-12-02: NSA bugging your phone? KGB watching your house? Aliens invading your brain? Relax! Now all of these services are managed by Google!
73: 2011-11-30: Don't believe any Area 51 show you see on television - especially if I'm in it! There's no evidence of aliens there, just bad reality TV.
74: 2011-10-31: Aren't we all alien visitors to this planet?
75: 2011-10-31: A visitor to an alien planet is not responsible for the fate of that world but only for the effects of his own actions.
76: 2011-09-24: Hollywood armageddon involves alien invasion, viral infection or nuclear war, but the real apocalypse will be economic.
77: 2011-09-02: @xtinewu The dark side of the moon is where the alien bases are. Did you see them?
78: 2011-08-19: Alien craft. http://t.co/Y0kssZb
79: 2011-08-19: Alien Fresh Jerky, Baker, California. http://t.co/zOiP2F0
80: 2011-08-14: @LetsGo2TheBeach The central pavilion at LAX—or an alien craft. You decide.
81: 2011-07-29: Just saw the movie "Cowboys and Aliens". SPOILER ALERT: Cowboys win, humanity is saved! (although things were looking grim for a while)
82: 2011-06-29: I got aliens on the brain at Area 51. http://twitpic.com/5ickjp (6/14)
83: 2011-06-17: #### End live one-hour essay: "Alien Birth Control"
84: 2011-06-17: Only the aliens can save us from ourselves. Only they can say, "No more babies 'til you take care of the ones you already have."
85: 2011-06-17: Alien-imposed birth control should be released only when the humans prove they can procreate responsibly.
86: 2011-06-17: The aliens, with their advanced technology, should be able to prevent human reproduction, perhaps by disabling sperm or neutralizing libido.
87: 2011-06-17: .@dunebat "Or the aliens could implement one themselves." <== It is not their place to make the policy, only to insist there be one.
88: 2011-06-17: I have only one request of the aliens: Sterilize the human race until they implement a credible parental licensing program.
89: 2011-05-19: Alien anal probe, Pensacola, Florida. http://t.co/FeY1lwQ
90: 2011-05-01: Evil is something that invades the soul, replicates itself and spreads from person to person like an alien virus.
91: 2011-04-25: Lessons of Childhood #2: Whenever you hear a theremin, a sinister alien encounter is imminent. Run!
92: 2011-04-02: It doesn't matter if aliens are visiting our planet or ghosts are haunting our mansions. They are shifty characters you just can't rely on!
93: 2011-03-30: If invading aliens had any brains, they'd disable our electronics first. Then everyone would be like "Huh? What happened? What do we do?"
94: 2011-03-30: RT @LosAngelesTaste: Alien Invasion Movies Take Note: Apparently The Aliens Should Win http://sns.ly/ebcNy2
95: 2011-03-24: .@lolahayes "I come in peace" <== Alien bromide or masturbatory serenity?
96: 2011-02-26: Alien life might not be so different. They will know pi, physics, death, the struggle of individual vs society and the fragility of life.
97: 2011-01-28: You got to give those aliens credit: At least they're staying out of our business! Anything they did would just screw us up more.
98: 2011-01-27: Aliens make poor benefactors. They don't understand the planets they are trying to help and often end up making matters worse.
99: 2011-01-10: Paul, the Area 51 alien, movie trailer. http://j.mp/eIBhig (I can confidently say I had nothing to do with this.)
100: 2011-01-10: Transgender issues seem silly. We are ALL aliens in our bodies! Changing your gender won't resolve your problems, only promise to.
101: 2010-12-16: Aliens did not create the problems of Planet Earth. It is unreasonable to expect them to save us.
102: 2010-12-12: The alien data is in! UFO sightings, plotted geographically, tend to cluster around cities where there are UFO groups.
103: 2010-12-01: NSA bugging your phone? KGB watching your house? Aliens invading your brain? Relax! Now you can consolidate all these services with Google!
104: 2010-11-08: The most bizarre and alien organism is our own body. How did we get stuck inside this?
105: 2010-10-30: If alien life presents itself to us, we'll have to deal with it. Until then, searching for it is a poor use of our resources.
106: 2010-10-16: Solution to the UFO mystery: an advanced race of alien cats. With laser pointers. Trying to get even.
107: 2010-09-26: Paranoia is a defense against loneliness. If the CIA is bugging your phone and aliens are probing your mind, at least somebody cares!
108: KilroyCafe: 2010-12-09: RT @jleico: UFOs & Extraterrestrials Aliens Working Alongside Humans at Area 51 http://goo.gl/3ChHv
109: KilroyCafe: 2010-10-16: RT @BadDalaiLama: Solution to the UFO mystery: an advanced race of alien cats. With laser pointers. Trying to get even.
110: KilroyCafe: 2010-08-20: Photo: @TheBosha interviewed in an undisclosed location. Acknowledges tunnels could contain alien life. http://bit.ly/aeBb10 (Aug. 8)
111: KilroyCafe: 2010-08-08: @TheBosha I understand there are SECRET UNDERGROUND TUNNELS throughout Pennsylvania. Is that where they're keeping the aliens?
112: KilroyCafe: 2010-07-30: The most important responsibility of gods and aliens is to not give people false hope. The locals have to work things out for themselves.
113: KilroyCafe: 2010-07-12: According to sources, there are UNDERGROUND TUNNELS under the streets of New York City! Could this be where the government keeps the aliens?
114: KilroyCafe: 2010-06-28: Among adult humans, curiosity is rare. They may notice an alien presence in their environment, but they won't change course to investigate.
115: KilroyCafe: 2010-03-13: If the aliens finally came to rescue me I'd say, "No, thanks!" Maybe not the best planet but it's workable and I still have things to do.
116: KilroyCafe: 2010-02-10: The aliens are playing with us, giving us tantilizing evidence but never enough and leaving us hanging in the end. Sort of like #Lost.
117: KilroyCafe: 2009-12-10: Mystery cocoons discovered at St. Louis shopping mall. Photo album of my investigation: http://bit.ly/5Yp41G - I conduct an "alien autopsy".
118: KilroyCafe: 2009-12-04: Once we discover alien life and sit down to talk with them about the important things, we'll probably find they don't know shit either!
119: KilroyCafe: 2009-11-28: If alien life presents itself to us, we'll have to deal with it. Until then, searching for it is a poor use of our resources.
120: KilroyCafe: 2009-10-29: The place that most impressed me in Australia was Coober Pedy, a town with many houses built underground. Totally alien and unexpected!
121: KilroyCafe: 2009-10-15: Solution to the UFO mystery: an advanced race of alien cats. With laser pointers. Trying to get even.
122: KilroyCafe: 2009-08-22: If the NSA is bugging your phone and aliens are probing your mind, well, at least somebody cares!
123: KilroyCafe: 2009-06-26: Whatever UFOs may be, they are not interfering in our planet in any big way, which is the most we can expect of any alien race.
124: KilroyCafe: 2009-06-26: Aliens did not create the problems of Planet Earth. We did! It is unreasonable to expect aliens to solve our problems for us.
125: KilroyCafe: 2009-06-11: If UFOs exist, you got to give them credit for obeying the Prime Directive. That's the most you can ask of any alien race.
126: KilroyCafe: 2009-06-11: When aliens abduct hysterical women from their beds, they always bring them back - sadly.
127: KilroyCafe: 2009-06-02: Stopped again at the Little A'Le'Inn and had a World Famous Alien Burger. Just as I remembered: awful! Obviously, the aliens weren't fresh.
128: KilroyCafe: 2009-05-19: Sleep paralysis is the nightly disabling of motor muscles to prevent injury while dreaming. AKA incubus, alien abduction.
129: KilroyCafe: 2009-05-10: We are all aliens here. One morning we woke up on this strange planet, in a body we didn't choose, living with a really bizarre family.
129 tweets found.

(Search module created 7/18/2013)