The Sacred Archive of Ancient Wisdom
of His Badassliness the Bad Dalai Lama
Please give new life to our Ancient Wisdom by retweeting our old tweets. Click on date for the original tweet.
Feb 7 2013: My first shot at voice acting, reading the preface of my new book, The Case Against Marriage https://t.co/VeuXSR2n http://t.co/LIr88C8X[End of archive. 1000 tweets displayed of 15877 archived as of , .] Please give new life to our Ancient Wisdom by retweeting our old tweets. Click on date for the original tweet.
Feb 7 2013: Set phasers on stun! Blown away by this amazing device, opening up a whole new world... of sound! #h4n http://t.co/bA87vc5r
Feb 7 2013: Who killed Laura Palmer? 20+ years later, here is the real Twin Peaks (my photos from 2009) https://t.co/bYFfR7vP http://t.co/ynIipJTL
Feb 7 2013: RT @TIME: Sperm quality reduction linked to increased TV viewing | http://t.co/YffEHPWN (via @TIMEHealthland)
Feb 7 2013: RT @washingtonpost: What the kitchens of the future looked like - in the 1960s http://t.co/nWfyTZ2K
Feb 7 2013: @DalyaElMaghraby Nice is nice.
Feb 7 2013: Seeking healthy unmedicated right handed individuals with bad memories of childhood. http://t.co/wjXVNrL4
Feb 6 2013: Things can get a little crazy in South Dakota. http://t.co/ZXMGib89
Feb 6 2013: Dragon of the plains ... More photos from Eastern Washington (yesterday): https://t.co/zvKZLC3J http://t.co/itOKwR3j
Feb 6 2013: Fort Mifflin, on approach to PHL (2/1) ... More photos from the air: http://t.co/ffmrnPNs http://t.co/TJ8hSCrP
Feb 6 2013: "The way our bodies metabolize food is stuck somewhere in the Stone Age..." (quote found in an in-flight magazine) http://t.co/bfdhsbQY
Feb 6 2013: RT @Kyoks1: El no divorciarse no prueba el exito del matrimonio, solo que no se quiere cambiar via @BadDalaiLama
Feb 6 2013: The absence of divorce does not prove the success of a marriage, only the refusal to change.
Feb 6 2013: My best art photos: http://t.co/K05hC4HC Photo or painting? http://t.co/Iu9YSbkn
Feb 6 2013: Lonely bug seeks new owner (Spokane, today) http://t.co/IseThIFr
Feb 6 2013: On My Bucket List: Avenge the death of Richard III by restoring the Plantagenets to their rightful place on the British throne. [See Full Bucket List]
Feb 6 2013: "That's the wonderful thing about foreign travel, suddenly you are five years old again..." Quote: http://t.co/LYm0Skq7 via @AbbigailEva
Feb 6 2013: RT @TheBosha: What iconic Shakespeare characters will they unearth next? Mary Poppins? Benny Hill? Keith Richards?
Feb 6 2013: RT @TheBosha: We dug David Bowie up after ten years under a cab stand in Tribecca and he's releasing a new album. This Richard cat is ju ...
Feb 5 2013: @laurenahayes Wow! A living Barbie! Watch out or Mattel will be after you for copyright violation.
Feb 5 2013: RT @edictive: Self-plagiarism is style.- Alfred Hitchcock
Feb 5 2013: Why did the chicken cross the road? Here is one whose motives can no longer be questioned. Photo from Kauai: https://t.co/TSnPr6NN
Feb 5 2013: Butte, Montana - photos shot yesterday https://t.co/NloxFj5W http://t.co/umUGSlN5
Feb 4 2013: Butte, Montana - 360° interactive panorama (yesterday) http://t.co/SPVVh5iP Zoom in for detail of mines and downtown. http://t.co/wCBThTNE
Feb 4 2013: A 6-second message from Montana. http://t.co/2l8eCJGY
Feb 4 2013: @LadyFriday You're missing out on the action. 10% discount at Dennys!
Feb 4 2013: @LadyFriday Why wait? You can join right now!
Feb 4 2013: @BadDalaiLama It's only fair! 3 boxes = 300+ bullets per customer per day.
Feb 4 2013: Running low on ammo at Walmart in Bozeman, Montana. http://t.co/u4W2wM8a
Feb 4 2013: Yipes! Places I know! ==> New York tourist found dead in Istanbul http://t.co/ZjVqj0JP via @MailOnline
Feb 4 2013: Can't wait for the Team America version! ==> RT @MailOnline Thunderbirds Are Go! (Again): Cult TV show to return http://t.co/uCYtTk7P
Feb 4 2013: Many of life's tragedies could be avoided if there was tape delay between brain and mouth.
Feb 4 2013: My Best Overseas Travel Photos (outside North America) 2007 to present. http://t.co/IeE0nSJr http://t.co/AsdCBsHG
Feb 4 2013: "Glenn Campbell Lite" - Our Facebook fan page, highlighting just our best work. http://t.co/eiTuM4Bj http://t.co/6jzuVoTz
Feb 4 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: It is not a sin to have money in the bank, only to spend it frivolously.
Feb 4 2013: A connoisseur is someone who cares about the surface of things, not the function underneath.
Feb 4 2013: You can't erase your trace.
Feb 4 2013: @BadDalaiLama Yes, it is possible to be Hawaii'ed out. Even Paradise can wear thin.
Feb 3 2013: My 15 photo albums from Hawaii (newly indexed) http://t.co/rjJMLNOm Your February escape! http://t.co/QdPRpkBu
Feb 3 2013: Nothing if not poetic. ==> RT @Telegraph Deadliest marksman in US military history shot dead http://t.co/A41ZY5ei
Feb 3 2013: @BadDalaiLama Actually Rocky Horror Alexander Hamilton.
Feb 3 2013: My best North America travel photos: https://t.co/3mOFEB05 http://t.co/AfbVKzie
Feb 3 2013: Our new master index of North America albums: http://t.co/rJ1PFJcH http://t.co/4sNAkVoE
Feb 3 2013: The ultimate test of morality is what works in the long run.
Feb 3 2013: Wise Hobbits know the world is out there, beyond your Hobbit hole, not sitting at home watching Hobbit movies.
Feb 3 2013: Intellectual growth is not just reading a book. It is going out to see if the book is true.
Feb 3 2013: True intellect is constantly testing your own limitations against the constraints of the outside world.
Feb 3 2013: It is no proof of intellect to have read a lot of books and done a lot of crossword puzzles.
Feb 3 2013: South Dakota sunset (this evening) ... More from the Northern Plains: http://t.co/ZntvFTi8 http://t.co/9DqukYSK
Feb 2 2013: RT @kasthomas: Don't "aspire" to be a writer. Go make some typos.
Feb 2 2013: Ice Princesses ... More: https://t.co/yU7iOFh2 http://t.co/8NzbmnDR
Feb 2 2013: Ice fantasy. http://t.co/WZ2dlrE4
Feb 2 2013: Bloomington, Minnesota (1 hour ago) http://t.co/o2I5htp7
Feb 2 2013: To exercise the best of your abilities, you have to stop trying to explain yourself.
Feb 2 2013: Found in my wallet: Rocky Horror Thomas Jefferson. http://t.co/3OLmKJaN
Feb 1 2013: De-icing in Pittsburgh. 5 minutes of raw airport action shot yesterday morning. http://t.co/iQ8aiska
Feb 1 2013: ...and here is the post-consumption Scandinavian design. (re @BadDalaiLama) http://t.co/udbP3scd
Feb 1 2013: Until now, I didn't know plastic straws had an environmental footprint. http://t.co/Z3Q1KJM8
Feb 1 2013: I only eat at Ikea for the Scandinavian design. http://t.co/P5KXD5Y5
Feb 1 2013: Not as wet as you might suppose. http://t.co/FactRDVd
Feb 1 2013: Your friendly de-icing man. http://t.co/srWjPHJS
Feb 1 2013: De-icing in PIT (1 hour ago) ... More: https://t.co/XD8pWENG http://t.co/UOjnwEl8
Jan 31 2013: New York of the 1950s—as shot this afternoon! ... More NY from NJ: http://t.co/oR46QLd1 http://t.co/BnHdGk4g
Jan 31 2013: RT @TheEconomist: America's mandatory minimum jail sentences, in effect, have transferred discretion from judges to prosecutors http://t ...
Jan 31 2013: Intelligence is separating emotions from facts.
Jan 31 2013: Don't confuse obligation with meaning.
Jan 31 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: College professors are to education as the figurehead is to a ship: irrelevant and unnecessary but giving the illusion o ...
Jan 31 2013: Buying a product to fix a problem usually seems easier than actually changing ones life, which involves far more anxiety.
Jan 31 2013: A catastrophe is catastrophic only because you have committed yourself to a set of constraints that make it so.
Jan 30 2013: A bridge is a remarkable engineering triumph when first unveiled and an ordinary fixture of life thereafter.
Jan 30 2013: Because I'm a semantic rebel, I read this as "Stop ONLY associates beyond this point." http://t.co/ujVVNhZw
Jan 30 2013: Every movie character needs a personality disorder—some dysfunctional mode of behavior that seems rational to them but looks loony to us.
Jan 30 2013: @BadDalaiLama The original English version of the interview: http://t.co/VRFGMtoi
Jan 30 2013: My interview just published in a liberal Istanbul newspaper. "Marriage is like being chained to your loved one." http://t.co/qCRLD7B2
Jan 30 2013: @theslowcentury An interview is only as intelligent as the person doing the interviewing.
Jan 30 2013: @theslowcentury Um, ah, that's actually one I'd rather forget.
Jan 30 2013: My book was mentioned today on Turkish television! (Bet that's never happened to YOU!) http://t.co/e5OQ7Jy4 http://t.co/XwuoUtxe
Jan 30 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: When choosing between a cheap & effective solution and an expensive & inferior one, most take the latter because "You ge ...
Jan 30 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: Television is the force-feeding of experiences, much faster than your emotional system can digest them.
Jan 30 2013: Boo at the Zoo, Gainesville, Florida. One of my best albums of 2011. http://t.co/WCcQnqzb http://t.co/MTvBX7Dk
Jan 30 2013: Social media tip: No one wants to hear about your medical conditions (unless they are colorful and you have pictures).
Jan 30 2013: Never trust with your life anyone without the maturity and good credit to rent a car.
Jan 30 2013: @BadDalaiLama Certainly the quantity of music has increased but not the number of songs people remember and sing to themselves.
Jan 30 2013: When rental car companies refuse to rent to people under 25, it tells you something about the real boundaries of childhood.
Jan 30 2013: Princess sighting at the Orlando Airport (May 2012) http://t.co/qNPH9OiS
Jan 30 2013: Florida rules & regulations (Ocala, today) ... More Central Florida photos https://t.co/n59LZW4o http://t.co/pgT9J4gy
Jan 30 2013: @TheViewFromHell Wow! This is quite a find! I have been looking at the samples on Amazon. Maybe I need a Kindle!
Jan 30 2013: No one knows less about music than professional musicians. They can play and dissect it, but they can't hear what the average listener does.
Jan 30 2013: Today's technology has replaced musical talent with musical obesity.
Jan 30 2013: A music paradox: Today's musician has tools that would blow away Bach or the Beatles, yet the production of great works has not increased.
Jan 30 2013: Everyone says they want the truth about themselves except when you give it to them.
Jan 30 2013: There is little difference between "expressing your anger" and "blinded by rage."
Jan 30 2013: TEST READERS WANTED. If you want to read The Case Against Marriage before publication, I am looking for guinea pigs. http://t.co/ijD90Flp
Jan 30 2013: RT @MailOnline: Just a couple of BITES of chocolate are as tasty as a whole bar, claim scientists http://t.co/M4BlSsl1
Jan 29 2013: Once upon a time, January used to be called "winter" and most if the U.S. was covered with "snow". Not today. http://t.co/l5NbIzDG
Jan 29 2013: RT @latimes: Opinion: Proposition 8 defense: Marriage exists for -- what? http://t.co/WLk1ekWP
Jan 29 2013: RT @TIME: Pope's dove of peace attacked by seagull of irony | http://t.co/Li7YtBxT (via @TIMENewsfeed)
Jan 29 2013: United States Navel Reserve — American military organization stockpiling belly buttons for those who don't have them.
Jan 29 2013: @MinnieGupta Photos or it didn't happen.
Jan 29 2013: New York to Moscow. Silly Spring pricing. (Add $250+ for a 3-year visa.) http://t.co/gL0ILppc
Jan 29 2013: Cancer does not have to be cured. We just have to survive it long enough for something else to kill us.
Jan 29 2013: Longevity means keeping all the preventable illnesses and accidents at bay until the non-preventable ones kill you.
Jan 29 2013: Time flies, dude! Those rebels of early rock who died of drug overdoses might be dying now anyway—of old age!
Jan 29 2013: Master index of all my photo albums (600+ albums on Facebook) https://t.co/Azn7lFSD
Jan 29 2013: Direct from Lower Thorax, the funniest wisdom of His Badliness: @BadLamaFunny
Jan 29 2013: My best relationship photos https://t.co/mPENZB0F - http://t.co/xX5S9KX6
Jan 29 2013: Having a lot of money will give you more things you can do with your life without accomplishing anything.
Jan 29 2013: RT @TheEconomist: To the delight of TV channels in Turkey, the Islam and sex debate is growing noisier http://t.co/hit4zvn3
Jan 29 2013: RT @MailOnline: Tweetping: Map tracks each of the world's Twitter posts in realtime http://t.co/O6cXPd3Y
Jan 29 2013: RT @TheBosha: I'm all for women in combat. In fact I'm all for anything that keeps ME out of combat. #YouGoGirl
Jan 29 2013: RT @LadyFriday: Why Pot Is Illegal Everywhere in the World http://t.co/ZJBdS1L0 via @motherjones
Jan 29 2013: RT @DSLikesIt: @BadDalaiLama The Dunning-Krueger effect. Which also explains why only the incompetent think they're aces.
Jan 29 2013: The talented often underestimate their own ability because their skills and judgment seem so obvious to them.
Jan 29 2013: Being right doesn't mean it is worth the battle to prove it.
Jan 29 2013: The gratitude of those rescued becomes less with each rescue.
Jan 29 2013: The benefit of having lived through catastrophe is you can better see the big picture. You don't get hung up on little things.
Jan 28 2013: Many will talk about it. Few will actually do it.
Jan 28 2013: Don't promise, just do. Doing isn't as dangerous as promising and not following through.
Jan 28 2013: No food gets in your mouth without your own hand putting it there, and no one has more control over that hand than you do.
Jan 28 2013: Who knows what lurks in the darkest recesses of the mind? (My first Vine production) http://t.co/rfdy8kHb
Jan 28 2013: Vine is kind of intriguing because it is very restrictive: only 6 seconds of video. Watch new posts in real time here: http://t.co/VEZZ20Sd
Jan 28 2013: RT @HLMenckenBot: Economic independence is the foundation of the only sort of freedom worth a damn.
Jan 28 2013: Generation who refuse to grow up: No mortgage, marriage or children! http://t.co/8vaeoTu1 via @EkDoTween Her comments: http://t.co/HhCNkCXK
Jan 28 2013: One week in Paradise — Airfare $155. Car rental $150. Gas $50. Food $75. Lodging $0. New pair of pants $15. Total = $445. (re @BadDalaiLama)
Jan 28 2013: @lawnrocket How do you expect to make it in Hollywood if you don't pump up your puffery level? TEST AUDIENCE WOWED BY LATEST COATS SHORT!
Jan 28 2013: Movie 43: 5% fresh! http://t.co/6vrGuSsl
Jan 28 2013: "The longer Lucas stayed in the universe he created, the less emotionally sophisticated his movies became." http://t.co/luotA0OH
Jan 27 2013: I hate civilizations where they make you bathe, use restrooms and wear proper clothes. It's so constraining.
Jan 27 2013: Either you exercise your art at the highest level you can or you try to explain it to others. You can't do both.
Jan 27 2013: @BadDalaiLama This is the tragic site where I completed the final manuscript of my first published book. Hitting "Send" to publisher.
Jan 27 2013: If you are free, every disaster is a new opportunity for self-education. If you are not free, it is just a disaster.
Jan 27 2013: Every form of refuge has its price, and even if you pay the price, any protection may still be an illusion.
Jan 27 2013: My best office in Puerto Rico! Shade, breeze, Verizon Internet. But watch out for falling coconuts! http://t.co/5Dexv6uJ
Jan 27 2013: Check out my new Lite™ feed on creativity and art: @BadLamaArt - Retweets from both past and present on the creative process.
Jan 27 2013: @epappa Lutefisk AGAIN? Can't we have something different?
Jan 27 2013: Photography is a sixth sense, letting you see the world in a different way. Your eyes tell you one thing but photos tell you something else.
Jan 27 2013: @DalyaElMaghraby Really? You leaving now?
Jan 27 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: There is no safe harbor. You can never go home. You can only sail onward. Forever alone.
Jan 27 2013: @BadDalaiLama After a series of appeals.
Jan 27 2013: Misplacing your iPhone makes you recognize the fragility of life.
Jan 27 2013: Sunset in Tarifa, Spain, Sept. 2010 ... My grande collection of sunsets and sunrises: https://t.co/zbvSMLqV http://t.co/2SyFcnjh
Jan 27 2013: Success is not real if it commits you to repeating the same success in the future.
Jan 27 2013: Dreams can give you useful connections but they can't give you more real-world data than you already have.
Jan 27 2013: Follow your dreams, but check Wikipedia first. Dreams can play loose with the facts.
Jan 27 2013: Material success is best measured not by money but by the freedom actually gained.
Jan 27 2013: Venting your spleen by spewing bile is just what spleens do. Read your spleen owner's manual.
Jan 27 2013: Upon gaining instant wealth, most will put it back into the same slot machine it came out of.
Jan 27 2013: Most wealth is squandered either by buying things you don't need or by putting it back in the same slot machine it came out of.
Jan 27 2013: Winning a contest created by others is not the same as accomplishing something.
Jan 27 2013: The only reason to climb Everest is to go home and brag about it. You have lost many months that could have been used for better things.
Jan 26 2013: A pseudo-accomplishment is done only to impress others without any useful purpose in itself. Eg. climbing Everest, winning a beauty contest.
Jan 26 2013: Pardon me, would you have any Grey Poupon? http://t.co/8gfji3ZE
Jan 26 2013: Millions of vile villains vent miles of vicious bile.
Jan 26 2013: Puerto Rico: American slick meets Latin American grunge.
Jan 26 2013: Sunrise in Guanica, this morning ... More photos from Puerto Rico: https://t.co/Wb3Ug7ct http://t.co/D20ieF0A
Jan 26 2013: "The Art of the Frame" - my new essay written yesterday. Where should a work of art begin and end? http://t.co/qEu8YFDl http://t.co/J21e3QOl
Jan 26 2013: Camping Tip: Diet Coke can be used for almost anything you would use water for, like bathing or rinsing your toothbrush. No sticky residue!
Jan 25 2013: This week has been tough. No bed to sleep in. No heat. Forced to bathe in the ocean. Need a little Newark in January to lift my spirits.
Jan 25 2013: Chupacabras = nasty Hobbitses! We hates them we do! (re @BadDalaiLama)
Jan 25 2013: Just another Mordor sunset. (Lajas, Puerto Rico, 1 hour ago) http://t.co/78jEhpsz
Jan 25 2013: The Prime Directive is not just for protection of indigenous cultures but also alien visitors, who can easily get in over their heads.
Jan 25 2013: @hysell What do you do for antibiotic metabolic database resistant bacteria? Those buggers are clever!
Jan 25 2013: A rule of gypsy camping: Don't look for scenic camping spots. Look for safe places you won't be noticed. Save scenery for daylight.
Jan 25 2013: A common artistic affliction: He used to be creative. Now he's just repetitive.
Jan 25 2013: Given a secure job, a place to live and food on the table, most will sit around, consume entertainment and accomplish nothing.
Jan 25 2013: Young people are driven less by the need for accomplishment than by the need to appear accomplished to others.
Jan 25 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: The more resources you have at your disposal, the more "necessities" you think you need.
Jan 25 2013: Pretty art, easy on the eyes or ears, is different from meaningful art engaging the mind.
Jan 25 2013: Success, for most, is the end of personal growth.
Jan 25 2013: Most success is a fluke that cannot be repeated by the same methods.
Jan 25 2013: The most important skill of an artist is grasping what is going on in the mind of the viewer.
Jan 25 2013: Most of what passes for investing is everyone racing to the slot machine where the last jackpot was won.
Jan 25 2013: My spirit animal is a dung beetle. ==> For dung beetles, Milky Way is guiding light http://t.co/YuPHSW4c
Jan 25 2013: @BobBlahBlawg We need a Federal Caloric Police Force to visit all restaurants to make sure all dishes have been properly assayed.
Jan 24 2013: RT @shitgirlssay: I don't care, do whatever you want.
Jan 24 2013: Chupacabra bait. Me. Right now. Waiting for nightfall. http://t.co/3i03kV8J
Jan 24 2013: The tastes and goals of youth are bound to change as we gain more experience, but youth cannot foresee how.
Jan 24 2013: Now it can be told: Hitchcock was a psycho. Who would have guessed?
Jan 24 2013: "The Meaning of Life" - 1-page sample from the final chapter of The Case Against Marriage. Putting 'er to bed! http://t.co/28WI7ImG
Jan 24 2013: If you love someone, why would you want to take away discretion? Isn't your love strong enough to stand on its own?
Jan 24 2013: "A baby laughs when he learns something new. An adult may feel good when someone they care about solves a problem." re @BadDalaiLama
Jan 24 2013: @BadDalaiLama This tree is growing right in the middle of my office! (And providing the shade thereabove.)
Jan 24 2013: Gender neutral language: Use he/him where no one would be offended. Use they/their when gender bias might be inferred. Avoid she/her.
Jan 24 2013: Forget fracking! I'm fricking frustrated with frucking fructose!
Jan 24 2013: RT @SuperSillay: Good judgement comes from experience. And experience comes from bad judgement.
Jan 24 2013: Beauty without imperfection is inaccessible and easily forgotten.
Jan 24 2013: Art must convey an important lesson about life. Otherwise, it is just a pretty picture, a garage sale item.
Jan 24 2013: Roots. http://t.co/plccoM3a
Jan 24 2013: "The Art of the Frame" - an essay I don't have time to write right now, but here is the illustration (shot today) http://t.co/Jd50xkOa
Jan 23 2013: Q: If a tree falls in the forest and there is no one to see, does it really fall? A: It does not fall in a meaningful way.
Jan 23 2013: If you can't address the system, don't treat the symptoms.
Jan 23 2013: The secret of bathing in salt water. http://t.co/XIUMeff0
Jan 23 2013: "Social Pressure" - a 1-page sample from our forthcoming book, The Case Against Marriage http://t.co/fZz16k7D
Jan 23 2013: The elders want you to become a potted plant, stuck in one place. It was good enough for them, so why isn't it good enough for you?
Jan 23 2013: "Things You Don't Need: UFOs" - my short blog entry from 2009 http://t.co/eaYZnCxY http://t.co/SmPa23VQ
Jan 23 2013: Boundaries mean knowing where I end and you begin.
Jan 23 2013: Life hangs by such a fragile thread. Don't test it!
Jan 23 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: Poverty sucks, and this must always be so. Otherwise people will not be motivated to escape it.
Jan 23 2013: Law is an idealistic theory that must be fine-tuned for the real world by conscientious evasion and discreet disobedience.
Jan 23 2013: The best kind of creativity is: Think of it. Do it. Get rid of it. Move on.
Jan 23 2013: If wisdom was all in the heart, we would have no need for a brain.
Jan 23 2013: If I was a dung beetle and other dung beetles tried to take my food, I'd be like, "Hands off that shit, that shit's mine!"
Jan 23 2013: If an artist has to explain what his work means then both he and the work have failed.
Jan 23 2013: Anyone trapped in a prison of their own making usually wants you to join them.
Jan 23 2013: My spirit animal is a coyote... Wile E.
Jan 22 2013: There is no college course for one-handed chainsaw juggling. You have to learn by trial and error.
Jan 22 2013: @BadDalaiLama My current theory of treatment: any kind of greasy lotion to drown 'em and aspirin to systemically reduce the itch.
Jan 22 2013: Sand fleas—worst scourge of the Caribbean since Blackbeard! Walk on the beach, with or without shoes, and soon your legs are itching.
Jan 22 2013: Intelligence is a choice. Some adults are smart and others stupid mainly because they choose to be and arrange their life that way.
Jan 22 2013: Found my perfect camping spot near Arecibo. Just a few yards from the beach, but invisible from the highway. http://t.co/v3I0N9bX
Jan 22 2013: La Cueva Del Indio (Indian Cave), Arecibo. ... More cave photos: https://t.co/Wb3Ug7ct http://t.co/bDDpd2NA
Jan 22 2013: Puerto Rico is the most exotic place you can go whilst still remaining within the comforting bosom of Walmartania.
Jan 22 2013: An ounce of character detail is worth a ton of special effects.
Jan 22 2013: Can you identify this giant beachball? Keys and sunglasses for perspective. Light enough to have floated here. http://t.co/UOE4D8Jl
Jan 22 2013: Just performed some delicate seaside surgery on my only pair of jeans. It was medically necessary. http://t.co/nK1HEtVh
Jan 22 2013: @BadDalaiLama That last tweet written under a coconut tree. http://t.co/rESo1qUf
Jan 22 2013: Walking under a coconut tree? No problem; statistics are in your favor. Sleeping under a coconut tree? Statistics turn against you.
Jan 22 2013: Optimists believe there is always a silver lining. Pessimists believe there isn't. Opportunists create their own. (cc @sarisfere)
Jan 22 2013: RT @vipertongue: For every ceramic-plated Kevlar heart, there's always a Teflon-coated armour piercing round.
Jan 22 2013: RT @TACKFilms: "A man who dares to waste one hour of time has not discovered the value of life." - Charles Darwin #Quote
Jan 22 2013: You cannot stay together "for the children" and not expect the children to be damaged by it.
Jan 22 2013: The necessity of bathing can be strategically reduced through the judicious application of deodorant.
Jan 22 2013: What we often take for symbiosis is really just parasite and host, and vice versa.
Jan 22 2013: Art is an exercise in mind reading.
Jan 22 2013: It is the responsibility of the artist to read the mind of his audience and move at their pace.
Jan 22 2013: You can stretch the boundaries of an artistic medium but you cannot break them. If you do, the audience cannot digest your work.
Jan 22 2013: Puerto Rico is full of sad little doggies with no home. This one stayed outside my car all night. http://t.co/92mR8JQw
Jan 22 2013: Puerto Rico wants to marry the US, becoming the 51st state. I want to tell them, "Please, PLEASE think this through." Remember Greece.
Jan 22 2013: Love usually means you will ignore something better if it happens to come your way.
Jan 22 2013: When does vigilance become paranoia, love become masochism, art become obsession? Few know where to stop.
Jan 22 2013: Every investor is tempted by the Sunk Cost Fallacy.
Jan 22 2013: Investment means you are willing to accept second best for yourself to avoid its loss.
Jan 22 2013: Children adapt quickly not so much because their brains are supple but because they are unburdened by investment.
Jan 22 2013: Adults are willing to grow, just not in ways that upset their prior investments. So they don't grow.
Jan 22 2013: Tropical car camping tips: 4) Bring a light airline blanket as nighttime temps could dip into the 70s. Brrrr! (re @BadDalaiLama)
Jan 21 2013: Tropical car camping tips: 3) Prepare for rain, which almost always happens sometime before dawn. (re @BadDalaiLama)
Jan 21 2013: My office for today. Everything you need in an office: internet, quiet, shade, ocean surf, tropical breeze. http://t.co/5VxWTfsa
Jan 21 2013: Monkeyfruit, crying for help! http://t.co/kLZ2Vs4v
Jan 21 2013: Happyfruit... or sadfruit? http://t.co/fZOpAIqT
Jan 21 2013: Our new Lite feed on art, film & creativity: @BadLamaArt - http://t.co/vCJbldqJ
Jan 21 2013: Man in the Moon. http://t.co/ElmJoNmc
Jan 21 2013: My homunculus is keeping an eye on you! http://t.co/6TR4gvMm
Jan 21 2013: No free spirit survives without an element of curmudgeonly Machiavellianism.
Jan 21 2013: What's your cover story?
Jan 21 2013: All Hail Zoran of Thorax! http://t.co/LopP0Pdh
Jan 21 2013: Sunset, Barceloneta, Puerto Rico ... More: https://t.co/Wb3Ug7ct http://t.co/J7kt93G1
Jan 21 2013: These suckers are out to get you. Bop you on the noggin they will! http://t.co/KD59vV9u
Jan 21 2013: Tropical car camping tips: 1) Don't park under a coconut tree. 2) Park near the shore so the breeze keeps the bugs at bay.
Jan 21 2013: Nature in its natural form involves a lot of death.
Jan 21 2013: Success never tastes as sweet as you thought it would.
Jan 21 2013: "The Credit Card of Life" - a new 1-page sample from our forthcoming book, The Case Against Marriage http://t.co/Jq7TyuzO
Jan 21 2013: The great thing about surfing is all the waves are free. You're only spending your life trying to catch them.
Jan 21 2013: My only co-worker at the office. Easy to work with because I never see him. (re @BadDalaiLama) http://t.co/ZeC6N5kR
Jan 21 2013: Want to destroy someone? Give them fame and fortune they didn't fairly earn. They'll usually self-destruct. Works especially well with kids.
Jan 20 2013: @BadDalaiLama Coconuts on the beach but not directly above. (An important safety concern.)
Jan 20 2013: Our new Lite feed: @BadLamaArt - our wisdom on creativity, film, writing, photography and art.
Jan 20 2013: Would you trust this hair transplant surgeon? http://t.co/DGMNAawn
Jan 20 2013: The true emblem of frequent flyer status is you get to the check-in counter, the agent asks for your destination and you don't have a clue.
Jan 20 2013: More have perished driving to the store for hand sanitizer than from any disease caused by not using it.
Jan 20 2013: The difference between LOTR and The Hobbit is originality—the feeling of everyone involved that they are doing something new and risky.
Jan 20 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: In fiction, there can be a magical problem, but there shouldn't be a magical solution. The hero must prevail through his ...
Jan 20 2013: I believe no one should be persecuted for their sexual preference, religious beliefs or political affiliations. They are all equally insane!
Jan 20 2013: Your most powerful creative assets are knowing what you want to do, having the means to do it and not needing anyone else to get it done.
Jan 20 2013: RT @NIETZSCHESOURCE: If we have our own "why" in life, we shall get along with almost any "how" http://t.co/k4Zn1j1O #NIETZSCHE
Jan 20 2013: RT @DostoevskyDaily: "#Existentialism declares that even if God did exist, that would change nothing." ÔÇĽ Fyodor Dostoyevsky @NIETZSCHES ...
Jan 20 2013: If you go through the motions some people may be fooled, even you, but history will know you were going through the motions.
Jan 20 2013: Every art becomes exclusive over time. Those who are good at it get better and those who aren't withdraw. #socialmedia
Jan 20 2013: Consciousness registers only the things that are different.
Jan 20 2013: Life is full of activities but you only remember the ones where the outcome was uncertain.
Jan 20 2013: In real life, as in the movies, the hero and villain are evenly matched because if they weren't there wouldn't be a conflict.
Jan 20 2013: If you fake a smile, laugh or frown, your mouth moves in a different way beyond your conscious control.
Jan 20 2013: You must respect and nurture your critics or they will go away, leaving you only sycophants.
Jan 20 2013: True acting is putting yourself in a position where when you smile you are really feeling it.
Jan 20 2013: There is a difference between laughing and pretending to laugh, a real smile and a fake one, and your audience knows it.
Jan 20 2013: RT @BarbiePeloNegro: Yo, ahora... http://t.co/7kHM51SP
Jan 20 2013: The trouble with emotionally needy people is they'll always be needy no matter how much you give them.
Jan 20 2013: You nurture a grudge for years, plot your revenge, only to find your subject has self-destructed on his own.
Jan 20 2013: One little shark attack ruins the beach for everyone.
Jan 20 2013: Admiring someone doesn't mean you should follow in their footsteps. The woods have changed and that path isn't there anymore.
Jan 20 2013: Trauma is the secret energy source of most great artists.
Jan 19 2013: Are you living your life or merely curating it?
Jan 19 2013: Most people see with their minds. They don't know how to see with their eyes.
Jan 19 2013: You repeat the same motions but sensation fades until you are only remembering the thrill not feeling it.
Jan 19 2013: Grönk Flakes manager's special. http://t.co/FziOIeFs
Jan 19 2013: @lawnrocket Don't you worry that you are damaging the fabric of space-time and we could all be annihilated?
Jan 19 2013: Fun with Scientology http://t.co/zGuIKUoZ via @xtinewu
Jan 19 2013: Art is the process of describing inner conflicts with outward symbols.
Jan 19 2013: Being "bad" is not violating an external rule but your own declared standards.
Jan 19 2013: BANISH GRAY HAIR FOREVER! - Get BDL's haircut.
Jan 19 2013: Try the wholesome goodness and consistent quality of Episcopalian White Bread.
Jan 19 2013: Oxymorons: fundamentalist Episcopalian, Episcopalian terrorist, Episcopalian sectarian violence, Born-Again Episcopalian.
Jan 19 2013: Episcopalians are my people! No confessionals or loud declarations of faith. Just keep it real and avoid asking too many questions.
Jan 19 2013: The trouble with Christians is they take the Bible as a bible, as though it was written by God and not a series of storytellers.
Jan 19 2013: "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding." - Proverbs 3:5 <== Um, not! God wants you to play dumb?
Jan 19 2013: Perseverance without intellect is the strategy of fools. Life doesn't owe you success just because you pursued the same unwavering course.
Jan 19 2013: If you want to get someplace, don't draw a line on the map. Just know what direction you're going and listen to the winds.
Jan 19 2013: Proposing a new retirement age: death. Shouldn't be a problem if you're doing something meaningful.
Jan 19 2013: On My Bucket List: Change the world by annoying people with signs and slogans. [See Full Bucket List]
Jan 19 2013: Creativity disintegrates when you are obligated to produce it.
Jan 18 2013: Augmented reality. When real reality just isn't enough.
Jan 18 2013: Home of the tick! (@ Old Lyme, CT) [pic]: http://t.co/TNT0ItL6
Jan 18 2013: Breaking bad, really really bad ==> Cross-dressing meth priest liked sex in rectory http://t.co/Sj76X3mJ
Jan 18 2013: Must be difficult being a woman and not being able to evade the authorities by shaving or growing facial hair. Can't get away with anything!
Jan 18 2013: Parenthood starts out wanting to do everything perfectly but ends up just hoping to survive.
Jan 18 2013: If I had a baby I would not breastfeed it, because I'm male and can't but also the huge inconvenience. Parenthood is compromises.
Jan 18 2013: Dollar store beauties. http://t.co/jeAWPgjw
Jan 18 2013: I am beginning to suspect that life is in 3-D but I don't have the glasses.
Jan 18 2013: Everyone makes mistakes in new situations. Wisdom is how quickly you learn from them.
Jan 18 2013: Message from the Delaware Bridge Authority: If you are going to commit suicide, please don't do it on our bridge.
Jan 18 2013: Latitude is really weird. As soon as you get north of Georgia, you don't even need air conditioning!
Jan 18 2013: Babies are fun!—to borrow, play with and return.
Jan 18 2013: Your life is in the here-and-now not in the what-might-be.
Jan 18 2013: For the wisest wicked wisdom of His Worshipful Badliness, check out @BadLamaNirvana - Just the good stuff!
Jan 18 2013: The easiest way to justify ones past mistakes is repeat them more flamboyantly.
Jan 18 2013: Must... Stop... Reading... @TheOnion
Jan 18 2013: Internet Users Demand Less Interactivity http://t.co/AoyZgiXs via @TheOnion
Jan 18 2013: My TV career explained ==> http://t.co/08PoPJKw via @TheOnion
Jan 18 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: The only trouble with 3-D is that no one remembers in 3-D. They only remember the story.
Jan 18 2013: Comfort is not the objects you surround yourself with but the ease of your mind.
Jan 18 2013: @MinnieGupta Add bacon and I'll have one!
Jan 18 2013: There are two ways you can respond to your problems: the way your past has programmed you or the way that really works.
Jan 18 2013: I am a perfect illustration of Heisenberg's principle, or maybe Schrödinger's cat. Once you know where I am I'm not there anymore!
Jan 18 2013: Many a dream come true has become a nightmare without end.
Jan 18 2013: Delaware—The Twilight Zone state your credit cards come from. Flatter than Kansas. Creepier than a Stephen King novel. Nobody pays any tax!
Jan 18 2013: Green screen isn't just for special effects. Why not use it for everything? - My proof-of-concept test: http://t.co/3QzCjImI
Jan 18 2013: Creativity is an individual pursuit. A team can contribute to the periphery of an artistic project but can't build its core.
Jan 17 2013: Although he pioneered the concept of unconscious motivation, the greatest gift Sigmond Freud gave the world was the term "anal retentive".
Jan 17 2013: The advantage in paying people when they would work for free is the exchange is over and you don't owe them anything.
Jan 17 2013: The trouble with teaching your art to others is you have to lower yourself to their level instead of pushing the limits of your own.
Jan 17 2013: The Superhero's Conundrum: The needs of the world are so vast that no matter how great your superpowers they will never be enough.
Jan 17 2013: Any time and energy spent running a writers group cannot be used for your own writing.
Jan 17 2013: Either you are a great artist or you are a support system for other artists. You can't be both.
Jan 17 2013: Yiiipes! Giant wall of snow straight ahead! http://t.co/CNLTyVpj
Jan 17 2013: The challenge to every superhero is how to not become super-exhausted and super-cynical when the demands for rescue exceed ones powers.
Jan 17 2013: Superman's problem isn't rescuing people. It's deciding who not to rescue.
Jan 17 2013: RT @jaydixit: Let this be a warning to any who dare omit the serial comma. #grammar http://t.co/GBn8WaVm
Jan 17 2013: One of the lessor known endangered species is the filet-o'-fish, hunted nearly to extinction for its unique square shape.
Jan 17 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: Narcissism: The world exists for me, but none of my mistakes are my own.
Jan 17 2013: Compassionate cadet releases mouse into the wild, which is immediately snatched by a hawk! What is the lesson? http://t.co/k1zFDsME
Jan 17 2013: If you get rid of the shit you don't need, it is amazing what you can accomplish.
Jan 17 2013: No one knows anything, but I know something. (correcting William Goldman, re @BadDalaiLama)
Jan 17 2013: Diplomacy is figuring out what someone has already invested in and carefully tiptoeing around it.
Jan 17 2013: A great movie is an external representation of an internal dilemma we all face.
Jan 17 2013: Being too nice, too concerned with the needs of others, you compromise your own potential and do less for them in the long run.
Jan 17 2013: Do it or eschew it, dude!
Jan 17 2013: Most are trapped in their own museum, clinging to the past so unable to move into the future.
Jan 17 2013: You will get ahead in life only when you make the hard choice to jettison things you are emotionally attached to but don't really need.
Jan 17 2013: Charlie Kaufman ("Being John Malkovich") on screenwriting & life. Neurotic, meta & inspirational. https://t.co/stpQK9Ut via @lawnrocket
Jan 17 2013: This tweet is meta.
Jan 17 2013: Offered an easy way out of facing their fears, most will take it.
Jan 16 2013: @BadDalaiLama Oh, and Cheney.
Jan 16 2013: The greatest tragedy of a relationship is having to suppress you own abilities to match those of your less talented partner.
Jan 16 2013: Every generation, the best and brightest flee small towns for the city. The unambitious stay behind and breed. Darwin's Dimwit Galapagos!
Jan 16 2013: Q: (a) small town where everyone knows everyone else's business or (b) big city where neighbors don't know you or care? A: Easy b! Freedom!
Jan 16 2013: @crushjunky I warned you!
Jan 16 2013: The hidden toll of obesity: a surge in breast violence. ==> "Girlfriend smothers lover to death with her breasts". See @MailOnline
Jan 16 2013: Temporary insanity can lead to permanent fatality.
Jan 16 2013: I know science doesn't back me up, but I still blame Ringo Starr for the extinction of the dinosaurs.
Jan 16 2013: Privacy is so 20th Century.
Jan 16 2013: Between secrecy and publicity is obscurity, the place most of us live.
Jan 16 2013: The beautiful schizophrenia of sleep. It is nice to be allowed those hours of madness.
Jan 16 2013: If you practice, practice, practice, you'll become more practiced at practicing, not necessarily more creative.
Jan 16 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: I know we've screwed up our environment, but I feel no guilt whatsoever for the extinction of the dinosaurs.
Jan 16 2013: Money is nuclear fuel. It may keep you alive, but it is also potentially poisonous.
Jan 16 2013: When something bad happens to you, you can either do something about it or you can't. If you can't, let it go!
Jan 16 2013: My best Toyko photos (April 2012) http://t.co/30fyngV4 http://t.co/PgWDHLLq
Jan 16 2013: The dirty little secret of Hollywood is the whole thing rests on the writer. Without him, no one else would know what to do.
Jan 16 2013: William Goldman (writer of Butch Cassidy etc) in new interview http://t.co/eIiSkMoS via @lawnrocket 1.5 hours. Mostly his personal history.
Jan 16 2013: How tall is Sylvester Stallone? 5'10" or 5'7"? http://t.co/Huq4OZQR
Jan 16 2013: Facebook's Graph Search will be cool if it can produce, say, "Glenn Campbell's photos from Barcelona". re @WSJ
Jan 16 2013: History is full of dicks. The only consolation is that history rapidly forgets them. (Except Nixon.)
Jan 16 2013: Tokyo is NOT expensive or particularly crowded. Myths! Confusing as heck, but the safest city on Earth. Nothing will hurt you!
Jan 16 2013: The secret to playing the game is don't play by their rules. Play by your rules.
Jan 16 2013: @lawnrocket Kinda sad, the ravages of time.
Jan 16 2013: Life is fragile and treacherous, like a small animal on the curb trying to cross a busy road.
Jan 16 2013: To understand a character you must ask, "What is his dysfunction and how did it happen?"
Jan 16 2013: A delusion is a belief that serves an emotional purpose in the believer but does not match the data provided by reality. @BadDalaiLama
Jan 16 2013: The way you build a character—and a story—is you give him a delusional system and let it play itself out. (cc @lawnrocket)
Jan 16 2013: The most popular musical group of all time is the One Hit Wonder.
Jan 15 2013: The moment you declare you have reached your destination, entropy begins.
Jan 15 2013: Sunset on approach to PHL (2 days ago) http://t.co/UmtPoN3q
Jan 15 2013: Achieving artistic success is only half the problem. The other half is not flaming out and self-destructing once you get there.
Jan 15 2013: Wisdom mainly involves managing your own emotions and predicting the emotional behavior of others.
Jan 15 2013: Whatever happens, never lose your heads. - re @latimes
Jan 15 2013: The fatal flaw in Facebook Graph is you have to actually CARE what your friends do. Pushing friendship a bit too far, aren't we? re @WSJ
Jan 15 2013: Google is like, "Meh! I know you better than he knows you!" - re @WSJ
Jan 15 2013: Own a piece of Paradise! Rustic homesites now available on Tatooine, Dagobah and Hoth. (Alderaan sold out.)
Jan 15 2013: The Mysterians: Invading Earth and Abducting Our Women! — Yes, please! ... More retro-future: https://t.co/lnSO5U2Q http://t.co/b7Eqbd0A
Jan 15 2013: RT @latimes: Lance Armstrong picks wrong way to come clean after playing dirty http://t.co/TUDzAENs
Jan 15 2013: Frankenstein movies fail to answer the most important question: "Will my HMO pay for this?"
Jan 15 2013: Life extension is the business of creating increasingly expensive technologies to keep the body going for those who can afford to pay.
Jan 15 2013: Motel 6 in Lantana FL pays for police protection: a cop stationed outside all night. Does that mean those who don't pay get less protection?
Jan 15 2013: Too much money is a burden to efficiency, encouraging lazy and complicated solutions to simple problems.
Jan 15 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: Nothing is as alluring as the unobtainable. It never disappoints!
Jan 15 2013: Relationship advice from dogs: Any cat that doesn't run isn't a cat worth chasing.
Jan 15 2013: Bummer that Romans threw Christians to the lions and Christians invaded Arabs in the Crusades but hasn't the statute of limitations run out?
Jan 15 2013: "Once upon a time, Europe got married" - another 1-page sample from The Case Against Marriage http://t.co/m2MuMVuP
Jan 15 2013: The ship has to actually be sinking, the band playing "Nearer My God to Thee," before some passengers are willing to jettison their baggage.
Jan 15 2013: Regret is so painful in humans that they usually rearrange their belief system to make it go away.
Jan 15 2013: Miami, last night ... More photos from Miami & South Florida http://t.co/CmeQVsNb http://t.co/VnWmjpbc
Jan 15 2013: @BadDalaiLama Corn sugar or cane sugar, it's still the same liver-processed fructose.
Jan 15 2013: The worst effect of fructose may simply be that it doesn't satiate you so you keep eating. Re @BadDalaiLama
Jan 15 2013: Gluten and fructose may or may not be bad in themselves, but if you avoid them you have a pretty good weight loss plan.
Jan 15 2013: Suicide may be triggered by stress but its root cause is an inability to compromise.
Jan 15 2013: It takes a while to see our parents for who they really are: not gods but kids like us who got in over their heads.
Jan 15 2013: If life gives you lemons make lemonade, but when it offers something better don't be trapped in a lemonade stand.
Jan 14 2013: Costco is fun at first but the fun stops when you start robbing convenience stores to pay for it. Get out while you still can!
Jan 14 2013: An economy defines ones identity. What makes Greece Greece, Britain Britain, you you and me me is our ability to manage our own checkbook.
Jan 14 2013: Insight is grasping the real reasons for your own behavior,
Jan 14 2013: Any charity given without strings can quickly be seen as an entitlement.
Jan 14 2013: The way the world keeps interrupting my Zen really pisses me off.
Jan 14 2013: Miami: Sleeping in a rental car with one thin blanket. Heaven!
Jan 14 2013: Naïveté is trying to go over the mountain that stands in your way instead of around it.
Jan 14 2013: It can be hard to separate love from paranoia. Does someone really care about you the way you think they do, or is it all in your mind?
Jan 14 2013: Is this love or paranoia?
Jan 14 2013: The camera of perception has multiple settings: depressed, euphoric, paranoid, passive. You need a balanced setting for accurate pictures.
Jan 14 2013: Paranoia is not just a delusion of threat but of unrealistic attention from others.
Jan 14 2013: If you can't stop your hand from putting unhealthy snacks in your mouth, then remove the snacks from your hand's reach.
Jan 14 2013: You can make any change to your own behavior that a prison could force upon you.
Jan 14 2013: "I know I should but I can't." = Either the goal is unrealistic or you need to change.
Jan 14 2013: The most pathetic display of cowardice is saying, "I can't help it," for actions you have physical control over.
Jan 14 2013: Cowardice is recognizing that your own behavior is bad for you but clinging to it anyway.
Jan 14 2013: Courage is recognizing when your own behavior is bad for you and changing it.
Jan 14 2013: Short answer: Fructose. ==> Americans, prosperous as they may be, do not live as long as many other nations http://t.co/TmGd6c5K
Jan 13 2013: @laurenahayes WARNING: Citation may contain substances known to the State of California to cause cancer in laboratory animals. Do not eat!
Jan 13 2013: @Andreaof9 Experience is the best teacher.
Jan 13 2013: @MinnieGupta Your globes are the goldenest, Your Minniness!
Jan 13 2013: Children learn by listening for the music. Adults learn by discovering rules.
Jan 13 2013: "Love is not Charity" - a one page sample from the manuscript of my forthcoming book, A Case Against Marriage http://t.co/4Bm330nG
Jan 13 2013: The problem with any safety net: If you offer it to people they will probably use it, but not for the life-and-death safety you envisioned.
Jan 13 2013: Money may be tyrannical and unfair, but at least it gives some default structure to our lives.
Jan 13 2013: Every gift you give has a cost. Any charity given without strings can quickly be seen as an entitlement.
Jan 13 2013: Negotiation requires that you have one foot firmly planted outside the relationship in an independent life where you don't need them at all.
Jan 13 2013: On My Bucket List: Police the Internet, drawing public attention to all instances of inaccuracy or fraud. [See Full Bucket List]
Jan 13 2013: The purpose of romantic love is to serve your own needs, not your partner's. You are not a therapist, provider or parent. You are consumer.
Jan 13 2013: Romantic relationships are successful only when power is relatively equal and each person remains responsible for their own problems.
Jan 13 2013: Pretty soon it is the White Knight who needs rescuing as the Fair Maiden badgers him and demands that he fix every other problem within her.
Jan 13 2013: The only thing sadder than divorce is a failed marriage that does not end. @BadDalaiLama
Jan 13 2013: Some of today's tweets are brought to you by "The Case Against Marriage" - now in final assembly in English. http://t.co/D3goQXyJ
Jan 13 2013: Security cuts both ways: In trying to lock out the uncertainties of the world, you are locking yourself in a cage that reduces your freedom.
Jan 13 2013: Divorce proves that nothing is free in life, even if love seems to offer it.
Jan 13 2013: Planning your life does not mean drawing a line on a map. It is equipping yourself with the best set of tools for whatever comes up.
Jan 13 2013: Humility is knowing that no matter how smart you feel right now your future self will call you an idiot.
Jan 13 2013: Check out @BadLamaFunny. WARNING: Not to be taken internally. Not a medical device. Individual results may vary.
Jan 13 2013: Youth likes to approach the world head-on, charging full-bore into obstacles instead of looking for an easy way around.
Jan 13 2013: For every wannabe trying to break into showbiz, there's a has-been desperate to get back.
Jan 13 2013: Colorado - photo album http://t.co/cf1Fxpig http://t.co/Y42m8jTP
Jan 13 2013: Sex and violence are what filmmakers use to get attention when they don't have any compelling ideas.
Jan 13 2013: The main reward of morality is a mind consistent with itself.
Jan 13 2013: Martha Stewart for Zombies: Remove head. Place in oven at 375° for 2.5 hours. Let cool. Crack open. Enjoy! Dilemma: white wine or red?
Jan 13 2013: @BadDalaiLama Ken Kesey might have owned this bus. http://t.co/fNJc3Imq
Jan 13 2013: @tasilsa Likewise with dudettes, but only literacy lasts.
Jan 13 2013: Bus for sale. Free delivery. Could be a bargain depending on your delivery area. (Oklahoma, July) http://t.co/k5e9P2rg
Jan 13 2013: @BadDalaiLama This is something only the camera can see. The naked eye would just go blind.
Jan 13 2013: Hot enough for ya? Oklahoma sunset, July 2012 ... More sunsets: https://t.co/atSmywTm http://t.co/1R6xUyYf
Jan 13 2013: Deepak Chopra + Dr. Phil + Dalai Lama + Tony Robbins < Henry David Thoreau
Jan 13 2013: deepakbullshit
Jan 12 2013: Capitalism may be brutal, but without a need for money most people wouldn't do a damn thing.
Jan 12 2013: RT @nytimes: Lindsay Lohan, careening debt and porn stars. What could go wrong? http://t.co/kaKgqrhT
Jan 12 2013: RT @MailOnline: IBM wipes supercomputer's hard drives in bid to stop potty-mouthed machine uttering obscenities http://t.co/3BIX0PAo
Jan 12 2013: Deeply regrets getting caught ==> Lance Armstrong Will Confess Drug Use to Oprah Winfrey, Sources Say http://t.co/dPvSlDnY re @BadDalaiLama
Jan 12 2013: RT @bybeautydamned: A person who hates himself will never be able to respect the person who loves him.
Jan 12 2013: If you "reward yourself" for good behavior by buying a luxury product, your behavior probably isn't all that good.
Jan 12 2013: Boston - photo album https://t.co/lmzxJyHq http://t.co/awBojoKJ
Jan 12 2013: We can't let concern for others lure us into trying to solve their problems for them. The best we can do is offer them tools.
Jan 12 2013: Give a young man a 4WD and he'll soon get it stuck someplace even a 4WD shouldn't go.
Jan 12 2013: Home is a nice place to visit but you wouldn't want to live there.
Jan 12 2013: The extreme of libertarianism is absurd selfishness. The extreme of liberalism is destructive dependence.
Jan 12 2013: The kind of people who play lotteries will spend themselves into debt no matter how much they win.
Jan 12 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: Made by elves? That's what the consumer wants: some fantasy about where his products and services came from. It makes it ...
Jan 12 2013: There are a million things you can do that you never thought you could. You just haven't been motivated to try.
Jan 12 2013: Home protection? Covered! (Today in Medford, Mass.) http://t.co/VAou0cQD
Jan 11 2013: The aim of paranoia is to kill the messenger before he has a chance to deliver bad news.
Jan 11 2013: @1jaimeportales Existential vulgarity perhaps.
Jan 11 2013: RT @1jaimeportales: This guy is great: @BadDalaiLama he can be very funny without any vulgarity whatsoever. Disclosure: I also follow yo ...
Jan 11 2013: If you know only a little of a language, it is unwise to try to speak it. When you say "Hello" people think you know their whole language.
Jan 11 2013: The main reward of morality is a healthy mind consistent with itself.
Jan 11 2013: Being committed to a certain path, you become blind to all others.
Jan 11 2013: Being surrounded by talented people can draw you away from things you should be doing yourself.
Jan 11 2013: @lawnrocket Last minute advice: 1) Hit the ground running. 2) All the audience cares about is the story.
Jan 11 2013: RT @shitgirlssay: I've got nothing else to say to her.
Jan 11 2013: @jonathan_katz I just read that as "Sheen". Many comic possibilities! #winning
Jan 11 2013: Materially successful but morally bankrupt. What is a filmmaker to do? Take the money and rant at the critics.
Jan 11 2013: RT @dunebat: This is one of the best posts I've ever read from @BadDalaiLama - http://t.co/g17sNpb0 Check out that last paragraph espec ...
Jan 11 2013: Artificial things that aren't so bad: contraception, medical care, indoor plumbing, sewage treatment, electronic communication, law.
Jan 11 2013: Nature's way, as humans experienced it for most of their history, is a short and painful life.
Jan 11 2013: Nature, left to its own devices, likes to kill things.
Jan 10 2013: Fructose vs. aspartame. One natural the other artificial. One deadly the other harmless. Nature does that sometimes.
Jan 10 2013: @lawnrocket No worries. Be proud! Or as @charliesheen would say: Winning!
Jan 10 2013: The magic of youth is being able to form confident opinions based on theory alone, completely untainted by experience.
Jan 10 2013: The pre-Walmart mom-and-pop stores of small town America weren't all that great when Mom and Pop had a monopoly. Never Low Prices.
Jan 10 2013: Simple minds need simple rules, like "Natural is better than artificial," and "Big business is bad."
Jan 10 2013: RT @hysell: Americans have been dying at younger ages for the last 3 decades, especially women. Link to report summary http://t.co/3ZxTk2gy
Jan 10 2013: Sugar was rare during human evolution. You had to fight for little bits of it. Now we pour it on in mass quantities! re @BadDalaiLama
Jan 10 2013: It's a symbiotic relationship. They need each other. ==> Charlie Sheen cuts $12,000 Check for Paparazzo's Funeral. See @TMZ
Jan 10 2013: Aspartame is safe. http://t.co/F119sWQs
Jan 10 2013: The perfect placebo for whatever ails you. No fat, sodium, fructose, gluten or caffeine. http://t.co/dY9rZTrY
Jan 10 2013: Fructose is processed in the liver as a fat and does not suppress hunger. http://t.co/fV8lJdS8
Jan 10 2013: How come Google doesn't know about "tum jacket"? Am I the only person who still has one?
Jan 10 2013: The ghrelin gremlins are grumblin' in my tum jacket.
Jan 10 2013: @EkDoTween I'm sure there are many placebos on the market that can help. I'm partial to glucose tablets.
Jan 10 2013: A busy life should not be confused with a meaningful one.
Jan 10 2013: People tend to confuse having a lot of obligations with having a meaningful life, so they pile on the obligations.
Jan 10 2013: The universe is indifferent to our needs. We must obey its rules not the other way around.
Jan 10 2013: @lawnrocket Pretty good for not being evil, but always remember @CharlieSheen has 8.7 million.
Jan 10 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: World's most powerful metaphor: Do you take the red pill and see things as they really are or the blue pill and go back ...
Jan 10 2013: Attn superheroes: Never hold your supervillain in a glass cell because he can always hack into the mainframe to get out. Steel never fails!
Jan 10 2013: Everything I know about current TV shows I learned from Wikipedia. I admire the stamina of you people for actually watching.
Jan 10 2013: Television sounds cool! Electrons beamed through space to convey moving images. I've seen it in stores. Someday I'll sit down and watch it!
Jan 10 2013: That's @bobbyislewis on about 50 screens at WalMart. We know that nerd from our Area 51 days. Nerd's the word! http://t.co/NUpVa4gS
Jan 10 2013: Success without discipline only sets you up for greater failure.
Jan 10 2013: My past self may have known a thing or two about a thing or two, but generally speaking: clueless!
Jan 10 2013: Dear Lance: Having sinned is not the end of hope. You can redeem yourself. Mercy is great for those who confess their sins before Oprah.
Jan 10 2013: Solution to the UFO mystery: an advanced race of alien cats. With laser pointers. Getting even.
Jan 10 2013: Less aye lay bun tomp roo lay!
Jan 9 2013: Planning is good, but be sure you leave space for serendipity to step in and give you something even better.
Jan 9 2013: Ontario makes Texas look puny, but it's too polite to brag about it.
Jan 9 2013: Prolific Prophet Pilfered Profits Forcing Furious Fed To File For Fraud (re @BadDalaiLama) #seanmorton
Jan 9 2013: You can be both smart and foolish at the same time: clever in pursuit of your goals but deluded in your choice of them.
Jan 9 2013: @Avestriel Are ants going to have much luck figuring us out?
Jan 9 2013: Any beings who can cross interstellar space have to be so technologically advanced that they seriously don't give a shit what we do.
Jan 9 2013: At least the aliens had the good sense to land only in the 1950s and 60s and not today when everyone has a video camera.
Jan 9 2013: Aliens have not yet announced themselves on this planet, but it's not too soon to ask them to leave. Earth for Earthlings!
Jan 9 2013: Dear aliens: The abductions that cannot be proven must end!
Jan 9 2013: Oxymoron Alert: "Christian existentialism"
Jan 9 2013: RT @PepGarcia: @BadDalaiLama jejeje Excelente espa├▒ol mi amigo!
Jan 9 2013: Bah! http://t.co/2Q9oh6DP
Jan 9 2013: The only words of Spanish I know are, "Je ne comprends pas."
Jan 9 2013: Drugs are for amateurs. Reality is for pros. (cc @HumanBeam)
Jan 9 2013: Don't worry be happy ignore danger die sooner.
Jan 9 2013: On My Bucket List: Confess my sins on Oprah. [See Full Bucket List]
Jan 9 2013: Lance Armstrong's product endorsement career may not be over. Red Bull? Nicorette Gum? Medicinal marijuana?
Jan 9 2013: @EkDoTween Best way to boost your immune system: Live in India where it gets lots of exercise. What does not kill you makes you stronger!
Jan 9 2013: Passive-aggressive Battleship ends with: "Fine, sink my battleship. I don't even care anymore. It's what you always wanted to do, so do it."
Jan 9 2013: On My Bucket List: Read about the disintegration of my own marriage at the supermarket checkout. [See Full Bucket List]
Jan 9 2013: Healthy ego is taking pride in your own product and its presentation. Narcissistic ego is thinking you matter apart from your product.
Jan 9 2013: When we fall in love we usually fall also into the futile exercise of trying to change our partner's personality.
Jan 9 2013: .@CharlieSheen is narcissism concisely illustrated.
Jan 9 2013: Money is not just an asset but a responsibility. If you have more of it than you need, it is your duty to use it for something important.
Jan 9 2013: The only luxuries that matter are decent medical care and control over your own time.
Jan 9 2013: Sociopathy generally correlates to displayed wealth.
Jan 9 2013: There is nothing wrong with money in the bank. You become an asshole only when you display your wealth.
Jan 9 2013: The flashier the car, the bigger the asshole driving it.
Jan 8 2013: In the Amazing World of Tomorrow, everyone will be the star of their own embarrassing reality TV show, broadcast on social media.
Jan 8 2013: Often we find in retrospect that what we wanted wasn't what we needed.
Jan 8 2013: You shouldn't pledge yourself to a romantic partner "forever" any more than you would offer them lifetime employment, for the same reasons.
Jan 8 2013: Maybe you love me, but you'll never know me like Google does.
Jan 8 2013: Depardieu: the French Mel Gibson? re @BadDalaiLama
Jan 8 2013: Depardick strikes again! ==> Gerard Depardieu fails to show up to face drunk driving charges http://t.co/oNjBLCDH Re @BadDalaiLama
Jan 8 2013: RT @WSJ: Some create "social media wills," some leave password lists. What to do online when a loved one dies: http://t.co/Hti5mTjw
Jan 8 2013: RT @shitgirlssay: The thing is, I shouldn't have to ask.
Jan 8 2013: RT @aristosophy: I watch what I eat, but by that time it's already what I eat, so the watching doesn't do anything.
Jan 8 2013: RT @HLMenckenBot: College teachers are commonly second-raters, for a man who really knows a subject is seldom content to spend his lifet ...
Jan 8 2013: Sean Morton: New update on my old Area 51 nemesis, UFO Watchdog: http://t.co/wlsGgRtH - Poor guy. His own worst enemy. http://t.co/KJBDb4aw
Jan 8 2013: IN CASE OF ALIEN INVASION: Keep calm. Turn on the news. See the aliens. Turn OFF the news. Go back to whatever you were doing. Fuck aliens!
Jan 8 2013: First rule of ufology: The aliens are always in the next hangar.
Jan 7 2013: My position on UFOs and Area 51. New blog entry. http://t.co/O2GV63by - In short: Agnostic. http://t.co/SednnGxM
Jan 7 2013: If you're incompetent you're too blind to know it, but if you're competent you're always doubting your skills because you see every defect.
Jan 7 2013: The incompetent don't know it because the same skills they lack are the ones they need to evaluate their own performance. re @BadDalaiLama
Jan 7 2013: If you're good at something you may not know it because the skills seem so obvious that you figure everyone must have them. re @BadDalaiLama
Jan 7 2013: The DunningÔÇôKruger effect - Why stupid people don't realize they're stupid. http://t.co/ogSfhRYI via @wahyuwei
Jan 7 2013: RT @WSJ: Most people are calm and cooperative, and most animals are as well. Beware exceptions across species: http://t.co/hYsShLkW
Jan 7 2013: Quack cocaine. re @MailOnline
Jan 7 2013: Evlili─če Kar┼č─▒ by Glenn Campbell — Our new book, "Against Marriage" currently available only in Turkish. (Learn Turkish now!) See @Geoaktif
Jan 7 2013: RT @wahyuwei: The Strange & Surprising Science of Sleep http://t.co/MMLYUwZc
Jan 7 2013: @crushjunky Wow! You've got our whole gender nailed. No fake Qtips for me!
Jan 7 2013: On My Bucket List: Retire at 65 and mooch off the system for decades. [See Full Bucket List]
Jan 7 2013: Why should senior citizens get discounts? Statistically, they're richer than the rest of us and have no family to support.
Jan 7 2013: My finest anthropological specimen and clearest window into human delusion is my younger self.
Jan 7 2013: New use for bacon: contraceptive! ==> "Eating a fatty diet could reduce a man's sperm count by 40%" re @MailOnline
Jan 7 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: Identity etched on the skin is a weak substitute for identity defined by behavior.
Jan 7 2013: Valentines Day means killing the one you love with fructose. http://t.co/5lqaAn0T
Jan 7 2013: A lower budget demands higher creativity.
Jan 7 2013: "Old" is self-defined by ones willingness to say, "I'm too old to change."
Jan 7 2013: @GeneV318 Gym isn't the issue. Exercise is trivial compared to caloric intake.
Jan 7 2013: Foreigners can't grasp the American obesity crisis because all the Americans on TV are thin. I try to explain: "Americans are HUGE!"
Jan 7 2013: @constanzaAbs Yes. http://t.co/2XASPsKF
Jan 7 2013: Negotiating with your future self is tricky. You never know exactly what that guy is going to want.
Jan 7 2013: From now on, I will only eat high fructose corn syrup with SEA SALT.
Jan 7 2013: NYTimes: Is Sugar Toxic? - on Lustig and his claims http://t.co/3eAN4Nzu
Jan 6 2013: According to Lustig, all sugar and starch can make you fat, but only fructose makes your liver fat. Human fois de gras!
Jan 6 2013: High fructose corn syrup and cane sugar have nearly the same fructose, so if fructose is bad, they're equally so.
Jan 6 2013: @BadDalaiLama Seriously, they gave him a number and made him live in this quaint village where his iPhone didn't work at all. Surreal!
Jan 6 2013: After he resigned, the Prisoner was kidnapped and taken to an island where he was chased by a weather balloon and denied Internet access.
Jan 6 2013: @constanzaAbs Glenn Campbell R Us
Jan 6 2013: Being kind and generous to someone in the moment is different than committing your future time to them. There you must be stingy.
Jan 6 2013: "At every age we think we're having the last laugh, and at every age we're wrong." — The End of History illusion: http://t.co/kkfF5L9y
Jan 6 2013: Yet another Lite™ retweet feed of our badassly wisdom: @BadLamaNirvana - Just our pithiest aphorisms. http://t.co/JtNo6j11
Jan 6 2013: Experience is necessary for wisdom but does not guarantee it.
Jan 6 2013: Failure is a precious resource, not to be squandered on self-pity but applied judiciously to ones own education.
Jan 6 2013: Privacy and secrecy are only temporary. Whatever you do, it will be public eventually.
Jan 6 2013: Any good thing done to excess becomes a bad thing.
Jan 6 2013: The only thing as dangerous as trusting first impressions is not listening to them at all.
Jan 6 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: Oxymoron Alert: Whenever an advertiser claims, "You CAN make a difference!" the proposed action is trivial and won't cha ...
Jan 6 2013: Just because a little of something is good doesn't mean a lot of the same thing is even better.
Jan 6 2013: Rub-a-dub-dub! Clean out your mind with the Bad Dalai Lama! (Skunk River, Iowa, Aug. 2012) http://t.co/fZ5hfPdi
Jan 5 2013: RT @philosophytweet: The high tech gypsies and jet set bohemians are leaving the institutions behind. The future is a pocket computer a ...
Jan 5 2013: Rare sighting of a @crushjunky in the wild. These shy creatures are seldom seen and never heard. http://t.co/miR4CVTJ
Jan 5 2013: @nguyenivy Ah, yes, hub of the universe!
Jan 5 2013: Instant casting! This 3-year-old took one look at me, with my Lex Luther haircut, and said, "Bad guy!" Made my day! http://t.co/imu7Aoob
Jan 5 2013: Depardick. ==> "Gerard Depardieu arrives in Russia to collect his passport from Putin" re @Telegraph
Jan 5 2013: If you expect to keep growing your entire life, you need to avoid investments that hold you down.
Jan 5 2013: RT @aristosophy: Just remember that all the places you daydream about would be tedious if you lived there.
Jan 5 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: A mirror can lie! It draws your attention to details and imperfections that others honestly don't see. It misses the who ...
Jan 5 2013: Nothing is sexier than knowing who you are and where you're going and not giving a damn what anyone thinks.
Jan 5 2013: The Sunshine Skyway wasn't very sunny on May 9, 1980. Some of them took the Acapulco plunge.
Jan 4 2013: No cosmetology is more cosmic than postmortem cosmetology. The final makeover. Clients sit still and never object. Good luck, @crushjunky!
Jan 4 2013: Smile! http://t.co/8lKFOIby
Jan 4 2013: Disappointment. http://t.co/Z1Rqjifr
Jan 4 2013: @crushjunky I support spaying and neutering for ALL scum of the earth. Those suckers are breeding too fast!
Jan 4 2013: love — n. the desire to mutually groom a fellow primate, removing parasites where required.
Jan 4 2013: How to hide your face from surveillance cameras. http://t.co/UhBlpi61
Jan 4 2013: The End of History Delusion: You think you'll stay the same but you won't. http://t.co/O3p23kXB
Jan 4 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: The maintenance of social order depends not on justice, which is unobtainable, but the illusion of it.
Jan 4 2013: Wow! 311 Likes, 104 shares, 83 comments. Nothing *I* ever posted got that much attention! https://t.co/nsSoMqCz
Jan 4 2013: @lawnrocket Dwarves must manage their own internal affairs. Your interventionist policies are not helping. Remember the Prime Directive!
Jan 4 2013: The Pyramids of Egypt, 2011 http://t.co/ELWbIx6l http://t.co/Ga466mf0
Jan 4 2013: The first step to getting out of the trap you're in is accepting the loss of your investment.
Jan 4 2013: RT @pocomaestoso: Ssss. Nassty _Hobbit_. Nassty swollen sluggish epicised _Hobbit_. We hates it, we does.
Jan 4 2013: In the Paris Metro in 2009, I found someone else's hand in my pocket. I responded with my camera. http://t.co/Z3iamilM http://t.co/icv1h2c7
Jan 4 2013: Some stars burn brightly when young but are dim embers by middle age.
Jan 4 2013: You can help someone with their current crisis, but there isn't much you can do to change their pattern of behavior that lead to it.
Jan 4 2013: There are many kinds of gamblers in show biz. Producers play high-stakes roulette. Writers count cards in poker. Actors play the lottery.
Jan 3 2013: I am hard at work on the English manuscript for "A Case Against Marriage". Until then, you'll have to learn Turkish. http://t.co/D3goQXyJ
Jan 3 2013: @piratehook3r As a sage once said, "Owning things is stupid."
Jan 3 2013: When celebrities abandon social media, it is usually because they have been caught in a lie.
Jan 3 2013: Presenting yourself on social media is not just exhibitionism. You are assembling yourself in the process.
Jan 3 2013: Marriage, children and pets are a public announcement that you are no longer planning any big changes. For better or worse, you've arrived!
Jan 3 2013: RT @jaydixit: What can a professional pickpocket teach psychologists about the nature of attention? http://t.co/PqAnMxzR @NewYorker #psy ...
Jan 3 2013: Paper Camera for iPhone is awesome! http://t.co/FPxHOfL1
Jan 3 2013: Crazy, insane justice. People can hunt, but a zoo director can't put an injured animal out of its misery. re @washingtonpost
Jan 3 2013: @SteveMartinToGo At midnight!
Jan 3 2013: @aristosophy You're writing from a field on the Czech/Austrian border? Or is that just where the body is buried?
Jan 3 2013: Just having your own act together is a superpower few possess.
Jan 3 2013: People who are cool need to stick together with others who are cool and avoid the uncool like the plague. It's us against them!
Jan 3 2013: NEW FLASH! Celebrity turns down thermostat! ==> "Queen turns off heating in greenhouses to save money" re @Telegraph
Jan 3 2013: Pathological sharing or pathological privacy?
Jan 3 2013: Is privacy pathological? Does sharing little of yourself with the world show that you have embarrassments to hide?
Jan 3 2013: Each person is drawn to their own form of eroticism. Personally, I'd like to see Hugh Hefner's prenuptial agreements. They must be awesome!
Jan 3 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: You never know what a person is really like until after the honeymoon.
Jan 3 2013: Thinking the unthinkable may be the only way out of the mess you're in.
Jan 3 2013: Given the credit card of life, most spend it to the max as soon as they can, laboring the rest of their lives to pay the interest.
Jan 3 2013: Ladies, you don't need lotions. Ointments maybe, but lotions are a scam.
Jan 3 2013: The more preconditions you place on life, the harder it will be to solve your problems.
Jan 2 2013: I want to offer a class on independent thinking. If anyone shows up, they fail.
Jan 2 2013: In retrospect the legacy of the Bush Administration is a mixed bag. Some policies sucked and some of them REALLY sucked. Re @washingtonpost
Jan 2 2013: The free food sample tastes fantastic! Buy the product, eat the whole package. Not fantastic anymore.
Jan 2 2013: Hey, Spooks, do you miss me? (@ National Security Agency (NSA)) http://t.co/q0kHlu84
Jan 2 2013: RT @Sheamus: Star Trek: The Next Generation blooper reel. Some gems here. http://t.co/ynLPuC7a
Jan 2 2013: RT @wahyuwei: Fructose Effect On Brain May Explain Link To Obesity http://t.co/fVobbouX
Jan 2 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: Buy an RV! — The lure of the open road! (for those who can't experience the open road without taking all their crap with ...
Jan 2 2013: The recklessness of youth explained http://t.co/P250rSPT via @WSJ
Jan 2 2013: RT @nytimes: Used to Hardship, Latvia Accepts Austerity, and Its Pain Eases http://t.co/9z453iik
Jan 2 2013: The Christian story is inspirational because it tells us anyone can be Jesus. You just have to be the Son of God.
Jan 2 2013: 48-hour guest of PHL. Arrived by plane and never left security. See Tom Hanks in The Terminal. Thanks, PHL! http://t.co/rnfsJdx4
Jan 2 2013: Is fructose poisonous? Why even risk it? Eat only bacon!
Jan 1 2013: RT @MailOnline: Dreading your diet? Don't worry...plump people live LONGER than their skinnier counterparts http://t.co/y4WapEnA
Jan 1 2013: Never confuse a "Duh!" with a "D'oh!"
Jan 1 2013: @BadDalaiLama If the weight loss secrets were effective and people stopped eating the desserts, there would be no need for future issues!
Jan 1 2013: RT @speedprior: @BadDalaiLama fast-sinking ship: your opponent is impersonal catastrophe. Slow-sinking ship: your opponents are the othe ...
Jan 1 2013: It's the law! Every issue of every women's magazine must have both weight loss secrets and recipes for rich desserts. http://t.co/1S0XqgUs
Jan 1 2013: RT @TACKFilms: "If you're going to tell people the truth, be funny or they'll kill you." #BillyWilder #Quote
Jan 1 2013: Hillary's blood clot is lodged between her brain and her skull—sort of like Bill.
Jan 1 2013: The Sacred Tweet Archive of His Badassliness the Bad Dalai Lama - now updated through 2012. http://t.co/YmDjI26l Search our font of wisdom!
Jan 1 2013: RT @KilroyCafe: Even after years of research and testing, there is still no clean-burning form of love.
Jan 1 2013: Is there really such a thing as a "cruelty-free product"? http://t.co/4BifxsKo
Jan 1 2013: Breaking News: Joe Biden is good for something!
Jan 1 2013: Lobsters in a pot or spouses in a marriage won't put up fight if you raise the temperature very slowly.
Jan 1 2013: When the ship is sinking very slowly, passengers are less likely to abandon it.
Jan 1 2013: Spectator sports: proof that your life has no meaning.
Jan 1 2013: New Years Resolution—for you!... Address me as "Your Badassliness" instead of "Your Badliness".
Jan 1 2013: I am not interacting with you but with the simplified image of you I have created in my mind.
Jan 1 2013: Spending New Years Eve like Tom Hanks in The Terminal. It's very peaceful here.
Jan 1 2013: New Years Eve in Madrid, 2010. http://t.co/FGd2phvS http://t.co/zqqcoOiN
Jan 1 2013: My Best Relationship Photos (album) http://t.co/K011E89K http://t.co/XSdcW736
Jan 1 2013: When you see someone talking to their clipboard, smiling and blowing kisses to it, you realize, "The future is here!" http://t.co/ZTqZ6rUW
Jan 1 2013: Whoosh! A sudden flash of insight! @aristosophy just taught me a new word: "satori".
Dec 31 2012: RT @aristosophy: ÔÖ¬ When the moon hits your I and you understand why, that's satori ÔÖ¬
Dec 31 2012: Comedy dances on the edge of discretion.
Dec 31 2012: My New Years Resolution: Don't wait for New Years to make resolutions.
Dec 31 2012: Politics is a minefield of words.
Dec 31 2012: When Al Franken became Senator, discretion kicked in and he stopped being funny. That is the price of politics.
Dec 31 2012: Comedy is the enemy of discretion.
Dec 31 2012: Discretion sayeth from within, "Hold thy tongue, Fool!"
Dec 31 2012: It is usually counterproductive to call the fat lady fat or tell the committed that they have made a bad choice.
Dec 31 2012: Detecting when discretion is needed is a never-ending social challenge, especially among people you don't know very well.
Dec 31 2012: RT @dunebat: @BadDalaiLama Is there an app for that?
Dec 31 2012: Discretion is the judicious selection of what thoughts to keep to yourself.
Dec 31 2012: RT @KilroyCafe: Free will dies the moment you say "forever". From that point on, love is a contract, not a choice.
Dec 31 2012: CNN antidote. Take two for instant relief. Caution: May be habit forming. http://t.co/YqU2NvwM
Dec 31 2012: New Years Eve advice: The last thing you want to do is be herded like cattle in Times Square.
Dec 31 2012: "It is good to have an end to journey towards, but it is the journey that matters in the end." ~Ursula K. Le Guin via @jos2thehua
Dec 31 2012: I could never be anyone in Hollywood because I don't use a Mac or drive a Prius.
Dec 30 2012: One young man living the dream. (Orlando Airport) http://t.co/xjcTmi48
Dec 30 2012: I'm all sparkly! (via Percolator) http://t.co/mqwJfD6v
Dec 30 2012: RT @piratehook3r: Owning things is stupid.
Dec 30 2012: @BadDalaiLama Obese TV watchers unaccustomed to physical activity could have heart attacks and sue the manufacturer.
Dec 30 2012: Exciting new 3D technology would allow people to actually GO OUT AND DO THINGS. Unfortunately, liability concerns have kept it in the lab.
Dec 30 2012: The greatest danger of a popular protest is the protestors get exactly what they want without considering the damaging consequences.
Dec 30 2012: For every well-meaning law or policy change, there is an unintended penalty, sometimes worse than the original problem.
Dec 30 2012: The hidden downside of an "on-time" airline: If your connecting flight is late, they won't hold the next plane for you.
Dec 30 2012: RT @TIME: 5 myths about sugar, explained | http://t.co/OJ3BnKhP (via @TIMEIdeas)
Dec 30 2012: "Zero Tolerance," in any domain, is an invitation to an inept and totalitarian regime. (cc @EkDoTween)
Dec 30 2012: Our new Lite™ feed: @BadLamaFunny - Just funny, nothing but funny, but maybe thoughtful, too.
Dec 30 2012: Passive-aggressive chess usually ends with, "Fine, take my queen. I'm too stupid to play this game. Maybe I'll just kill myself."
Dec 30 2012: The core demand of most protests is: "Someone must fix this problem. Not us, but someone else."
Dec 30 2012: On My Bucket List: Jump the shark. [See Full Bucket List]
Dec 30 2012: Planning a hunger strike to demand an end to all unfairness. Right after lunch. Or next week sometime.
Dec 30 2012: Anyone can be an actor. At least you can play yourself in different situations.
Dec 30 2012: Elven lembas bread for breakfast, lunch and dinner. I know it's healthy, but could I have some cheese and bacon with that?
Dec 30 2012: RT @KilroyCafe: "The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready." -- Henry D ...
Dec 30 2012: On My Bucket List: Monetize my social media streams. [See Full Bucket List]
Dec 30 2012: @lawnrocket PLUS.... When this actor storms off to her trailer in a huff, you know you can talk to her and coax her back on set.
Dec 29 2012: @lawnrocket Have you considered acting yourself? As Lawnie would say: Why not **DO** what you need? This actor accepts infinite direction.
Dec 29 2012: It is not "real" flying unless it's (a) a transoceanic flight of 9 hours or more or (b) a plane with propellers.
Dec 29 2012: RT @washingtonpost: Myth #4 about charitable giving: Nonprofits are not profitable. http://t.co/U2q3GMX2
Dec 29 2012: Philadelphia International Airport. This morning. http://t.co/BJL8XGf3
Dec 29 2012: Giant post-Christmas Batmans. Now's the time to get 'em! http://t.co/mKhyPpEC
Dec 29 2012: Don't be a victim of your own cleverness—finding ingenious ways to sustain a relationship that really should end.
Dec 29 2012: The temptation is irresistible. Come and get me, Westchester Gov! (At the door of a restroom.) http://t.co/51nfZEWy
Dec 28 2012: Annoying ear wax? Suck it out with the WaxVac! How did mankind survive? http://t.co/YR2iMAMt http://t.co/38fyYKKx
Dec 28 2012: @laurenahayes TMI! Not the Kingsley we want to see!
Dec 28 2012: RT @KilroyCafe: You are not responsible for the fate of planets, only for the things you can reasonably change.
Dec 28 2012: @DalyaElMaghraby Pubescent reticence.
Dec 28 2012: @HumanBeam Object permanence allows to see that its the same object anyway.
Dec 28 2012: Human relations is a minefield of ego sensitivities. Whatever you say, it is bound to offend somebody who has invested in the opposite.
Dec 28 2012: There is fine art in accepting the lessons of the mistakes you have made without punishing yourself for them.
Dec 28 2012: One who urges "Support Small Business" has never been ripped off by a local auto mechanic. Big Business at least means reliable rules.
Dec 28 2012: @aboriginalsol I would accept this philosophy in theory, but the Little Guy has ripped me off far too often. Big = consistency.
Dec 28 2012: RT @shitgirlssay: Could you do me a huge favor?
Dec 28 2012: RT @brianjaystanley: Negotiations grow more bitter, the less remains at stake. http://t.co/EEPD13jP
Dec 28 2012: Cook for a man, he'll eat once; teach a man to cook, he'll take you out to eat more often. (MRT@MinnieGupta)
Dec 28 2012: RT @aristosophy: Shaking my fist at the sky, shouting, "Undo. Undo. Undo. Undo. Undo."
Dec 28 2012: @laurenahayes Which only proves the superior management skills of the male.
Dec 28 2012: I'm no hotel snob, but I find in some of your finer hotels "hot" and "cold" on the shower correspond to actual temperature. Extraordinary!
Dec 28 2012: @BadDalaiLama I received this fortune just before learning that my car parked in the blizzard outside would not start.
Dec 28 2012: Whatever your dreams and plans may be, you also need a Plan "B".
Dec 28 2012: The full story of the bridge photo http://t.co/ZAHbAmZ0 re @BadDalaiLama
Dec 28 2012: RT @speedprior: @BadDalaiLama a similar observation would stop 99.9% of political discussions.
Dec 28 2012: The wannabe talent who is sitting at home right now, watching TV, waiting for his big break, will probably always be a wannabe.
Dec 28 2012: Talent is not just having a great idea. It is having a great idea that can be implemented now with the resources currently available.
Dec 28 2012: Every mediocre talent has a great idea they expect someone else to implement. The great creators do it themselves. (cc @lawnrocket)
Dec 28 2012: Escape from Montreal (earlier today) ... More Montreal: http://t.co/sXseXjGV http://t.co/CU7gWx5P
Dec 28 2012: Death is when you stop interacting. No more Facebook or Twitter updates. Emails and voicemails go unanswered. Weird!
Dec 27 2012: Gentlemen, we must stand firm against parthenogenesis, for it threatens the entire race of Man.
Dec 27 2012: It is not often that one changes planes in Weyers Cave. http://t.co/fkg2c3fE
Dec 27 2012: Fortune cookie wisdom. http://t.co/A5eS7eqS
Dec 27 2012: RT @KilroyCafe: Love alone cannot bear the weight of all we ask it to do.
Dec 27 2012: There are some questions from my previous life that I still have no answers to. http://t.co/bVuEWZ8K
Dec 27 2012: The Pierre Trudeau Airport is nice, but the Margaret Trudeau Airport would be a lot more fun.
Dec 27 2012: @aaroncajes NOAA Hi-Def Radar app.
Dec 27 2012: Beginning to look a lot like Christmas! (@ Gare d'autocars de Montréal) [pic]: http://t.co/UFFc1QcH
Dec 27 2012: Can't trust the internet! Radar says the snow ends at the Canadian border, but look outside! http://t.co/czi4Q2Iy
Dec 27 2012: Theme song of Canadian serial killers: "Stalking in a Winter Wonderland".
Dec 27 2012: Snoring observation at hostels worldwide: It's mainly when people sleep on their back. Change your sleep position! (Others: Bring earplugs!)
Dec 27 2012: RT @SteveMartinToGo: This [this] tweet [tweet] is [is] in [in] 3  D [D] ! [!]
Dec 27 2012: @laurenahayes Your feed has been Kingsley deficient of late.
Dec 27 2012: Old Montreal - new photo album shot this evening. http://t.co/ZuxwZpKb http://t.co/7rVkRv67
Dec 27 2012: Tea room. http://t.co/TFj3iGzE
Dec 27 2012: Helpful Mounties. http://t.co/klRQgT0C
Dec 26 2012: Vieux Montreal http://t.co/RQzc5TTj
Dec 26 2012: Place Montreal Trust on Boxing Day - 360° panorama http://t.co/JeVkWCLx http://t.co/N5qtfEHb
Dec 26 2012: @Quicksilwr It is the language of world commerce and culture. If you want entry to the world beyond your village, you must make the effort.
Dec 26 2012: Not a language snob, but if you don't speak English, you can't claim to be worldly.
Dec 26 2012: RT @KilroyCafe: The first bite tastes great! The 2nd is good. The 3rd is okay. By the 4th or 5th it's routine and boring. Same applies t ...
Dec 26 2012: A rainbow storm heading my way! http://t.co/N9b9hJXt
Dec 26 2012: @AbbigailEva Mmmm! My favorite part of Christmas—roasted cat! http://t.co/WlaQowKJ
Dec 26 2012: People in love are not sane. They are the worst people to be making fateful choices about lifetime commitments. @BadDalaiLama
Dec 26 2012: @BadDalaiLama California rental car tour: Start in LA. Coastal route to SF. Muir Woods. Yosemite. Vegas. Grand Canyon (<1 day). Back to LA.
Dec 26 2012: @BadDalaiLama Cheap lodging: hostels, Motel 6 and sleeping in the rental car. Swing through Vegas in car.
Dec 26 2012: @BadDalaiLama You'll capture everything memorable and culturally relevant and skip the boring parts.
Dec 26 2012: Advice to tourists: For the best of the USA, spend 1 day in NYC, 3 days in DC, 1 day in Vegas, and 3 weeks with a rental car in California.
Dec 26 2012: @LadyFriday Enjoy your roast beast!
Dec 26 2012: @AbbigailEva Mmmm! My favorite part of Christmas—roasted cat!
Dec 26 2012: My Christmas present from Istanbul: My first published book! Now available by the pallet. http://t.co/XuPAzQK9
Dec 25 2012: Jack Frost nipping at your nose. (@ Hotel Montréal Centrale) [pic]: http://t.co/w6Pwo0qi
Dec 25 2012: Bald headed guy flying to an airport named "YUL" on Christmas Day. Double serendipity?
Dec 25 2012: Ma destination d'aujourd'hui. http://t.co/ReluHa9g
Dec 25 2012: Public Apology: I have a range of powers but I am not technically a Power Ranger. I regret any ambiguities raised by my previous statements.
Dec 25 2012: My shame runs deep for not crossing the Trinity on Christmas. ("In the name of the Father, Son & Holy Ghost, Amen!") — @BadDalaiLama
Dec 25 2012: This dude has died many times before. Remember the Hindenburg! ==> Charles Durning, Prolific Character Actor, Dies at 89. RT @nytimes
Dec 25 2012: Always suspicious when the automatic mailing program of a large corporation wishes me "Warmest Holiday Greetings".
Dec 25 2012: @BadDalaiLama It would be 5am, in the dark, in the rain. I'm no wuss, but you have to add things up. Sorry I let you down, George!
Dec 25 2012: @BadDalaiLama It would mean wading across with a backpack. Can't tell how deep it is in the middle. Bare feet or wet shoes. = Pay the fare!
Dec 25 2012: 1am in Dallas: If I ford the Trinity here, I can save about $35 in taxi fare, but the river seems too cold and deep. http://t.co/tCGHD3Ec
Dec 25 2012: Christmas Morning 1776, Washington braved the icy Delaware to surprise the Hessians. Today, I tried to cross the shallow Trinity—and failed.
Dec 25 2012: RT @nytimes: No Easy Route If Assad Opts to Go, or Stay http://t.co/jlvAUjST
Dec 25 2012: @lawnrocket But if it's classified, isn't the fact that it's classified also classified?
Dec 24 2012: Much feverish activity at this Dallas Walmart. I do not comprehend your primitive Earthling customs. http://t.co/gBOGZGuv
Dec 24 2012: Like a pearl is formed around a grain of sand, every great story is built around an irony.
Dec 24 2012: No alien implant or parasitic invasion is more insidious than the Christmas carol stuck in ones head.
Dec 24 2012: @lawnrocket Where the hell R U?
Dec 24 2012: @lawnrocket Skeptical. "Experiences" = complication. What's wrong with plain old Hostelworld? Just book and go!
Dec 24 2012: @RhodiHawk Why that's antipodal!
Dec 24 2012: The sounds of Christmas in Bethlehem? Bagpipes! The proof: my video from 2010. http://t.co/PTYl10m0
Dec 24 2012: Christmas in Bethlehem — the REAL one! Photos & videos from 2010. http://t.co/FnX0r0IV http://t.co/QE4j5aOv
Dec 24 2012: Getting drunk is not a legitimate news story—unless you're a politician who campaigned on claims of sobriety.
Dec 24 2012: @BadDalaiLama But wait there's more! Crapo is a Mormon bishop who has claimed he abstains from alcohol.
Dec 24 2012: The more you have invested in something, the more you have to believe in it and continue investing. Right or wrong, you'll keep doing it.
Dec 24 2012: @BadDalaiLama That's crazy! It's nunsense!
Dec 24 2012: How does joining a convent have anything to do with God? It's not God telling you what to do but other nuns.
Dec 24 2012: Poor Crapo! Unfortunate name, party and timing. Let the jokes begin! ==> RT @washingtonpost: Senator arrested for DUI http://t.co/jL2Ak6fA
Dec 24 2012: There is no greater creative inspiration than 10 minutes of television. Any channel, any time. Watch 10 minutes. Turn it off. Week of ideas!
Dec 24 2012: Mother Delores Hart. Google her. Wild! http://t.co/uRus590h
Dec 24 2012: Pity the poor Australians, forced to listen to sleigh bells jingling and Jack Frost nipping as they throw prawns on the barbie at the beach.
Dec 24 2012: Christianity is more pure and perfect to the believer when its birthplace is distant and inaccessible.
Dec 24 2012: Babe in a manger. Christians thrown to the lions. Once you see these places and know the real history, you can't retain the same mythology.
Dec 24 2012: Christianity is Euro-centric now, its roots all but obscured. Even their Jesus is pale. Today, the Middle East just creeps Christians out.
Dec 24 2012: Two years ago, I spent Christmas in the most Christmasy place on Earth: Bethlehem, Palestine! My photos and videos: http://t.co/oCUfjUA6
Dec 24 2012: Most of the Christmas you see in Bethlehem, Palestine, is icons and rituals imported from America.
Dec 24 2012: The real Bethlehem at Christmas: no snow, no chill in the air. Thin people in Santa suits. American-style Christmas decorations.
Dec 24 2012: The upside of the American obesity epidemic is a plethora of Santa Claus candidates. No more dressing up a thin guy in a padded suit!
Dec 24 2012: Xmas Fact: St. Nicholas was thin as a rail, but Coca-Cola plumped him up and gave his cheeks a rosy glow in the spirit of refreshment.
Dec 24 2012: Xmas Fact: While St. Nicholas was real, the Santa Claus we know was created in the early 20th Century by Coca-Cola.
Dec 24 2012: Steve Jobs' saddest and most un-Jobsian legacy: a superyacht, now impounded http://t.co/s7Htbs4R via @TIME
Dec 23 2012: RT @TheEconomist: The media narrative is shaping up to pin the full blame for sending America over the fiscal cliff on the Republicans h ...
Dec 23 2012: Your generosity could be just the boost someone needs—or the crutch preventing them from solving their own problems.
Dec 23 2012: 15 Styles of Distorted Thinking http://t.co/Ezd611eH via @quippdPsych
Dec 23 2012: MRT @MailOnline Suicide nurse tried to kill herself TWICE before http://t.co/5FH30x0h <== So the DJs were just the trigger, not the cause.
Dec 23 2012: Best thing the NRA can do right now is resurrect Charlton Heston. At least that would prove God is on their side.
Dec 23 2012: Life in Middle Earth would be a whole lot different if the wizards who had fireworks also invented gunpowder.
Dec 23 2012: The greatest gift education can give you is the recognition that you can teach yourself.
Dec 23 2012: Education trains humanity's technicians and engineers, not its leaders and creators.
Dec 23 2012: I am winding down on Google+ in favor of my new Lite™ feed on Facebook. Info: https://t.co/XG5ooLve
Dec 23 2012: @Kyoks1 Big 'uns like Grand Victoria. Partial to Impala myself.
Dec 23 2012: "Clever" can be a foolish way to spend your life.
Dec 23 2012: Acrobats and jugglers can do some amazing things, but their time spent practicing has been taken away from useful and meaningful things.
Dec 23 2012: The higher the academic degree, the longer one has been sequestered from the real world.
Dec 23 2012: People with degrees have proven neither their intellect nor their creativity, only their tolerance of formal education.
Dec 23 2012: Sleighbells ringing, chestnuts roasting... Christmas carol imagery is stuck in a Middle Earth era of history that never actually existed.
Dec 22 2012: Wishing Rube Goldberg was still alive to explain Republican position on guns and taxes.
Dec 22 2012: Love can be an invitation to dysfunction, a debilitating delusion that says, "Someone else will save me."
Dec 22 2012: @siskonen That's a grandmom and she's not pregnant.
Dec 22 2012: Superhero demonstrating wrist utility device. http://t.co/nvtHyTrq
Dec 22 2012: Modern movies have a "cast of thousands" but most of them are sitting at computers. #digitalslavery
Dec 22 2012: What is useful, beautiful, worthy of your time? Most people look to others to make these judgments for them.
Dec 22 2012: The most important creative skill is being able to judge the value of something without other people telling you.
Dec 22 2012: Who can resist the temptation of the Chocolate Wunderfall? http://t.co/j7zQ1TWI
Dec 22 2012: Every form of prosperity has its own obesity—the crippling effects of getting everything you want.
Dec 22 2012: My Facebook fan page has been reactivated as a Lite™ version of my main FB feed. https://t.co/Htx1YdOm Less filling! http://t.co/Ahrs485B
Dec 22 2012: Sensible solution to school violence: Arm the teachers. When teachers go postal, arm the students. Arm everyone! Become the Shiva of arms!
Dec 22 2012: .@Andreaof9 You can believe in love without necessarily believing in the legal institution of marriage.
Dec 22 2012: "Glenn Campbell on Marriage" - New interview regarding my book released this week in Turkey. http://t.co/VRFGMtoi http://t.co/zLCuojf1
Dec 22 2012: Downtown Atlanta means driving a road 7 lanes wide in each direction. http://t.co/L0xy4E4s
Dec 22 2012: Creativity is the willingness to recognize and exploit opportunities that are available to you alone.
Dec 22 2012: Select the camera that works for you. @ TigerDirect http://t.co/jhCbM9ec
Dec 22 2012: Amid Republican chaos on taxes, guns and gays, it is easy to forget their one noble philosophy: Government can not solve every problem.
Dec 22 2012: RT @nytimes: A 52-Year-Old Man Is Convicted, in Juvenile Court, of a 36-Year-Old Murder http://t.co/svxPCGsB
Dec 22 2012: RT @washingtonpost: Bitter fight over taxes sends Republican Party into chaos http://t.co/Se5Fr0FI
Dec 22 2012: RT @shitgirlssay: Don't judge me.
Dec 22 2012: @LadyFriday What did the Pleidians do to you? I'm sure it must be some kind of misunderstanding.
Dec 22 2012: My tolerance for on-screen violence is limited to the Coyote's encounters with anvils from Acme.
Dec 22 2012: St. Thomas and Puerto Rico are next to each other, but St. Thomas is atrociously priced while PR is the same as the USA. Same tropical air!
Dec 22 2012: My most comfortable "home" is sleeping in a rental car on a beach in Puerto Rico. Low cost. Idyllic venue. USA cell service. No worries!
Dec 22 2012: @siskonen Not my grandmom! In Middle America, nearly all older women are "pregnant".
Dec 21 2012: @siskonen @mariarfin "The Case Against Marriage"
Dec 21 2012: Why have we not yet been contacted by the Galactic Federation? Perhaps it's the Great Filter. http://t.co/jJWKcucX via @wahyuwei
Dec 21 2012: It's the most wonderful time of the year... to visit a Muslim country.
Dec 21 2012: RT @KilroyCafe: Life is full of "Duh!" moments when you realize, "Things would have been so much easier had I only known that before!"
Dec 21 2012: Been reading some of my old screen stories from 2008. Some are quite good! Always a surprise at the end. http://t.co/xsaqOIU8
Dec 21 2012: .@StirringTrouble In the USA, winnings are taxable while most wagers can't be deducted. All large casino prizes are reported to the IRS.
Dec 21 2012: If you win a big jackpot but walk out of the casino penniless, you're worse off than you were. You must still pay taxes on your winnings!
Dec 21 2012: I wouldn't pay even $20 more for First Class, but I won't object if it's free. http://t.co/qYMk5iMW
Dec 21 2012: "These people shouldn't be in the same room let alone on the same team—and that is the definition of family."—Joss Whedon on The Avengers
Dec 21 2012: While I regret the loss of Mrs. Peel, I liked the Avengers because it gave cartoon characters authentic emotions and motivations.
Dec 21 2012: First you have a theory about what to do, then you hold negotiations with reality to determine what you actually do.
Dec 21 2012: Without mirror neurons, there could be no porn.
Dec 21 2012: RT @TheBosha: The Disneyesque belief in Love At First Sight has hobbled more lives than polio.
Dec 21 2012: Wide-eyed with wonder! A once-in-a-lifetime experience! http://t.co/iaP7qEcV
Dec 21 2012: "World's Largest Entertainment McDonald's!" Jealous? (@ McDonald's) [pic]: http://t.co/9x73bBSi
Dec 20 2012: My new VIRTUAL FILM STUDIO is now online, indexing all of my screen stories since 2008. http://t.co/xsaqOIU8 http://t.co/r0O01fDi
Dec 20 2012: Ford Crown Victoria: a Jabba the Huttmobile for those who spread widely. I feel fat just driving it!
Dec 20 2012: Avengers Fact: NASA's "Dark Energy Facility" was filmed in an actual underground NASA vacuum chamber.
Dec 20 2012: Avengers Fact: The streets of Calcutta were filmed on a soundstage in Cleveland. Fooled me!
Dec 20 2012: "The Panhandler"—my new original story for a short film, written today. An American success story! http://t.co/JcH1vOk0 http://t.co/FEZgCC4Z
Dec 20 2012: Decapitated nephew. http://t.co/3Zp4JUg2
Dec 20 2012: Kinky Nephew Makeover - new photo album http://t.co/YGkKg7Fa http://t.co/ImngDYr1
Dec 20 2012: @lawnrocket Nasty Hobbitses killed Bin Laden?
Dec 20 2012: Call me a Pollyanna, but "torture scene" mentioned in reviews is pretty much a guarantee I won't see the movie.
Dec 20 2012: Twitter to allow download & search of entire tweet history. http://t.co/gB1QDIBn <== HHBDL was there years ago! http://t.co/u2RTtBv2
Dec 19 2012: Of my high school graduating class, I am the only one who is still alive. #zombification #sosad
Dec 19 2012: Google's translated description of my Turkish book is amusing. Original catalog entry: http://t.co/QNgH7v0M Translated: http://t.co/Ammradrw
Dec 19 2012: A Holiday Tradition! — My "Walmart Christmas Carol" from 2008. Sing it now! http://t.co/jbUXXmQY Tune of "Silver Bells" http://t.co/IUtieJYz
Dec 19 2012: In every movie scene, a character will test his environment and learn something new. In a whole movie, he will be changed by it.
Dec 19 2012: On My Bucket List: Have reporters ask me, "To what do you owe your longevity?" [See Full Bucket List]
Dec 19 2012: This sign in a Sams Club parking lot in Orlando essentially gives RVers permission to camp here for the night. http://t.co/JjnvvAgR
Dec 19 2012: RT @aboriginalsol: The moment you unlock new abilities in the game of life. #priceless
Dec 19 2012: If someone asks you to marry them with some grand gesture like a billboard, get the hell out! Run!
Dec 19 2012: The Avengers is a good movie, but watching it with the director's commentary is even better. (Thanks for the opportunity, Sams Club!)
Dec 19 2012: All that counts in a movie is what the audience remembers and takes away with them. The rest of the movie is just getting to those moments.
Dec 19 2012: Some people are heat sinks: You pour energy into them, cause no chemical change and get no energy out.
Dec 19 2012: RT @KilroyCafe: The greatest atrocity of British English is the use of plural for collective nouns. "The team are" etc. The team is a bo ...
Dec 19 2012: Selection bias is watching the news and thinking the stories shown represent the state of the whole world.
Dec 19 2012: Being honest, truthful and responsible doesn't necessarily mean you should reveal everything you know.
Dec 19 2012: Who is going to protect the innocent middle aged uncle from his creepy and perverted little nephews?
Dec 19 2012: In law, the Work Product Rule means you are obligated to reveal the evidence to your opponent but not your analysis or strategy.
Dec 19 2012: Brain time is the most precious resource of all. If you waste neurons on one thing, you can't use them for anything else.
Dec 19 2012: The greatest wealth is the freedom to change.
Dec 19 2012: YouTube is millions of people saying, "Look at me, Mommy, look at me!"
Dec 19 2012: Being clever is not the same as having something to say.
Dec 19 2012: Just because someone is doing something clever doesn't mean it is worth your time to watch.
Dec 18 2012: Today, the nephews forced me to watch something called "YouTube". It made my head hurt.
Dec 18 2012: Is it really news, or is it disaster porn?
Dec 18 2012: There are 7 billion on the planet. If you grieve personally for every tragedy, disaster and injustice, you will get very very tired.
Dec 18 2012: Annoying nephews. http://t.co/MGerTiaA
Dec 18 2012: Creepy nephews make me do disturbing things. http://t.co/kmMFYARF
Dec 18 2012: Kinky nephew makeover now in progress! http://t.co/TLC4KuvG
Dec 18 2012: A lifetime of writing has finally paid off! I am now a published author - in Turkish! http://t.co/Gd8BiPpC
Dec 18 2012: RT @Geoaktif: Evlili─če Kar┼č─▒ - Bir ─░li┼čkinin Sosyal, Yasal, Ekonomik ve Psikolojik Sonu├žlar─▒ Geoaktif Yay─▒nlar─▒, Aral─▒k 2012 http://t.co ...
Dec 18 2012: "The Confession" (2008) - My most popular screen story - 2400+ hits. Rereading it, I can see why! http://t.co/D64I6XsR http://t.co/8MwRBfGF
Dec 18 2012: "Screenwriting Theory: The Flatland Analogy" - What makes a good short film? My half-page 2008 essay. http://t.co/Rk8RXI8s cc @lawnrocket
Dec 18 2012: People have problems, but they only want solutions that won't disrupt their existing emotional investments, so the problems persist.
Dec 18 2012: .@mariarfin The book title is an unpronounceable symbol, like the artist formerly known as The Artist Formerly Known as Prince.
Dec 18 2012: .@mariarfin The book is coming in English! Published in Turkey but probably available in Amazon. No schedule yet. Still got editing to do.
Dec 18 2012: Coming out of the closet! I'm tired of living a lie. I have a Khrushchev crush! (It used to be J. Edgar, but I've gotten over him.)
Dec 18 2012: You look at your romantic partner and say to yourself, "If only they were Nikita Khrushchev my life wouldn't be so boring."
Dec 18 2012: Brezhnev was boring, but Khrushchev was fun. Everybody needs more Khrushchev!
Dec 18 2012: A fun game I play every morning before I open my eyes: "Where Am I?"
Dec 17 2012: Here it is, my first non-self-published book! Hitting the streets of Turkey as we speak! What a hoot! http://t.co/S7lNGwVC
Dec 17 2012: Ambrosia, the perfectly designed food of the gods, is known in America as the Nacho Cheese Dorito. (*based on sales)
Dec 17 2012: Do not underestimate how quickly generosity can degenerate into enabling and dependence.
Dec 17 2012: @bobbyislewis Welcome to the 21st Century! Glenn Campbell, ex-Area 51 now following you! (although you killed me off in the screenplay)
Dec 17 2012: Arizona town is menaced by three evil strangers with unusual weapons. My Western: "11:59 from Prescott" http://t.co/kfwPmBTJ cc @lawnrocket
Dec 17 2012: Love is a mixed bag. Are you strengthened, or are you trapped?
Dec 17 2012: @crushjunky At a credible anti-aging conference, you would take photos of all the participants and compare them to last year's photos.
Dec 17 2012: RT @newscientist: Zombie horror infests the Large Hadron Collider <<movie made by students at CERN http://t.co/prQbUABs #Decay
Dec 17 2012: RT @Sheamus: Twitter Makes Good On Promise, Begins Rollout Of Downloadable Tweets Archive. http://t.co/WmohdVf1
Dec 17 2012: "11:59 from Prescott" - My 2009 screenplay for a short film. Western town menaced by 3 strangers. http://t.co/dwSvHIpi http://t.co/0OeGJkTR
Dec 17 2012: RT @wahyuwei: Interpersonal body and neural synchronization as a marker of implicit social interaction http://t.co/8dPBGLfy <== Ah, love!
Dec 17 2012: Personal growth: Take a car, improve its features one by one, and soon you have an entirely different car, even though it feels the same.
Dec 17 2012: RT @Telegraph: Arsenal show their attacking intent against Reading... <== Apparently Britons also have a problem with school violence.
Dec 17 2012: @aristosophy Couldn't have said it better myself! Now can you do something with "No use crying over spilt milk"?
Dec 17 2012: RT @HLMenckenBot: The kind of man who wants the government to adopt and enforce his ideas is always the kind of man whose ideas are idiotic.
Dec 17 2012: It may not mean anything to you, but Agent Scully once spoke my name on a TV show. Only if Mrs. Peel had said it would I be more fulfilled.
Dec 16 2012: Disasters can strike anywhere, but most are the product of conditions we ourselves create.
Dec 16 2012: You want to get someplace so you plot a straight line there, going over the mountain the hard way instead of gracefully around it.
Dec 16 2012: The hallucinations mean sleep is only a short step away.
Dec 16 2012: RT @aboriginalsol: The Hero's journey--entering into the depths of an unfamiliar world, obtaining it's lessons, and returning(hopefully) ...
Dec 16 2012: Wisdom is knowing when to trust your GPS and when to follow the road signs instead.
Dec 16 2012: Our twitter policies at http://t.co/o7IRdWba have just been revised, including a new Followback Policy http://t.co/cgGGjaL6
Dec 16 2012: There is no sense in expressing your opinion about social problems you can do little about. Save your energy for things you can change.
Dec 16 2012: RT @liberance: Friend says that once The Hobbit movies are finished with their extended editions, it'll take longer to watch the movies ...
Dec 16 2012: RT @OfficalMrBean: I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives.
Dec 16 2012: Dear True Love: I'm fine up to the swans a-swimming. One gift is sellable and six are edible. Beyond that, we got serious labor problems.
Dec 16 2012: Photography is usually a lie. Emotions at the time are rarely the same as appears in the photo. Just keep quiet and let it be. That's art!
Dec 16 2012: If you're lucky enough to have critics, their advice should not be fought. Are they all both deaf & blind, or do they see what you will not?
Dec 16 2012: Lord of the Rings felt completely real to me. The Hobbit felt artificial. Maybe it's not The Hobbit's fault, maybe just my own evolution.
Dec 16 2012: Being a great artist is not just producing one great work but having a unique system of processing that consistently produces great work.
Dec 16 2012: RT @washingtonpost: #Israel and #Switzerland are not gun-toting utopias http://t.co/SVeYKshi
Dec 16 2012: The more ineffectual a person is in their own life, the more time they spend arguing about national politics.
Dec 16 2012: news — n. an entertainment device designed to get people to argue meaninglessly about global issues instead of solving their own problems.
Dec 16 2012: Porn alert! Facebook censored some of my 2010 photos from Florence, so I was forced to cover them. http://t.co/mcShlY7u http://t.co/SDBV4njN
Dec 16 2012: How does one tell ones True Love that one doesn't need any of those things, starting with the partridge? #straighttoebay
Dec 16 2012: @MinnieGupta Have you sought help for this Sprinkles problem? Perhaps a 12-step program?
Dec 16 2012: RT @KilroyCafe: I'm dreaming of a "What Christmas?"
Dec 16 2012: Overview of my acting credentials added to my Creative Master Index: http://t.co/pqEuJSJl
Dec 16 2012: Unless you live in a war zone, you are 1000s of times more likely to die from your own bad habits than from aggressive actions by others.
Dec 16 2012: While the TV viewing audience frets over statistically insignificant risks, substantial risks close to home are ignored.
Dec 16 2012: .@BmuthaSupreme 10,000 gun deaths a year in 300 million population is not huge. Not defending guns, just saying they're not a top priority.
Dec 16 2012: From the Bizarre American Cuisine file: "Injectables" (apparently they're taking food intravenously now) http://t.co/9MmLuoW7
Dec 16 2012: The arsonist was so prolific he joined a frequent fire program.
Dec 15 2012: Trying to "lock in" happiness with a long-term contract is like nailing Jello to a wall. The nail stays but not the Jello.
Dec 15 2012: FYI: Every tweet on this stream is our own original work (unless you see "RT" or quotes). We steal tweets only rarely from our own past.
Dec 15 2012: RT @KilroyCafe: What part of "You're going to die" don't you get?
Dec 15 2012: Beauty pageants usually culminate with one girl saying, "I don't deserve this!" and fifty others pretending to be SO happy for her.
Dec 15 2012: Morality is not just choosing right or wrong but choosing, from all the available options, the best thing to do with your time.
Dec 15 2012: Billions following the news, instantly turning their attention to issues raised by the latest tragedy. Social responsibility... or ADHD?
Dec 15 2012: Gun deaths in the news are terrible, but guns are still a statistically tiny source of death. We care only because... they make the news!
Dec 15 2012: RT @TheNewDeal Gun Deaths 2011: Japan 48, Britain 8, Canada 52, Israel 58, Sweden 21, Germany 42, U.S. 10,728 <== Still statistically tiny!
Dec 15 2012: None of us has the ability to resist temptation completely, but we can delay it, divert it and avoid the places where it happens.
Dec 15 2012: West Virginians — A proud people! Larger than life. Testing how much adipose tissue can be attached to the human frame.
Dec 15 2012: Most of your worries about crime are easily addressed by asking yourself: "If I was an addict who needed cash fast, what would I do?"
Dec 15 2012: If you did everything you are supposed to do, you'd have time to do nothing.
Dec 15 2012: RT @HLMenckenBot: Liberty is not a thing for the great masses of men.
Dec 15 2012: This Walmart alone probably has enough ammo to kill 100,000. (cc @BadDalaiLama) http://t.co/nvphHoHy
Dec 15 2012: Cigarettes? No, the ammunition section at Walmart—actually a lot cheaper! http://t.co/jj0Jds9H
Dec 15 2012: Today is a good one to cull redundant, conventional accounts from your social media streams. Just search for "thoughts and prayers".
Dec 15 2012: RT @Neuro_Skeptic: Would Tarzan believe in God? http://t.co/mWUI9yk2 "Many scholars would say yes: cognitive biases generate religious i ...
Dec 15 2012: RT @MailOnline: This looks like another job for 007: Looking like a Bond villain, North Korean leader Kim Jong Un puffs on a cig... http ...
Dec 15 2012: Happiness is a moving target. Whenever you try to nail it down, it slips out from under you.
Dec 15 2012: When you are young, all dreams involve public recognition. You can't seek private satisfaction because you hardly know what that is.
Dec 15 2012: Are you pursuing a goal because it makes you happy or because you have already announced it to the world and don't want to be embarrassed?
Dec 15 2012: If you are losing focus on your dreams, maybe you should change them. Happiness is moving target, not a fixed destination.
Dec 15 2012: "Psychotherapy" - my first lesbian short film (in written form). Completed today. http://t.co/3gBefMM7 http://t.co/jbtPiZEi
Dec 15 2012: "The world is not in your books and maps. The world is out there!" — Gandalf the Gray
Dec 15 2012: The fact that you are following the news does not imply that you are informed or enlightened.
Dec 15 2012: With 7 billion on the planet and countless more in the galaxy, there will probably be a disaster every day. Do we need to follow every one?
Dec 14 2012: If the news is important enough, you can read up on it later on Wikipedia when it's relevant to you. There is little need to know it now.
Dec 14 2012: Sometimes it can be hard to obey the law even if you want to. (Miami, earlier today) http://t.co/af8Leokp
Dec 14 2012: RT @TACKFilms: "Most people do not really want freedom, because freedom involves responsibility and most people are frightened of respon ...
Dec 14 2012: I thought both The Master and The Hobbit were dreadful movies, but that doesn't mean they're not worth seeing. Gained many things from both.
Dec 14 2012: You go to a magic show and are blown away by the illusions. Then you see the same show again and notice the wires. That's The Hobbit.
Dec 14 2012: The Hobbit = Lord of the Rings remixed by some rapper dude who doesn't understand music.
Dec 14 2012: The happiest part of The Hobbit. http://t.co/sujRhu7b
Dec 14 2012: The Lonely Mountain... sequel in sight! http://t.co/PZMQTLi2
Dec 14 2012: Big birds rescue the Good Guys. Isn't that cheating? http://t.co/55j8SkXk
Dec 14 2012: Bilbo finally finds the strength in himself to use his sword. That's good news! It means the end is near. http://t.co/tpNeHn5G
Dec 14 2012: For a wizard, Gandalf sure is using his powers sparingly.
Dec 14 2012: My calculations say about 20 minutes left. Don't worry. I am a survivor. I will see this through! http://t.co/H8wjWEKS
Dec 14 2012: Only Bilbo himself has a spark of life, and it has nothing to do with the special effects.
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